What is the best way to overcome abuse and trauma?
- Keri wood
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Re: What is the best way to overcome abuse and trauma?
- Morgan Jones
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To sum up, teach yourself how to become better than your abuser.
- ReyvrexQuestor Reyes
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Let's take Thirteen Reasons Why, the Netflix show. The screenwriter evidently was just trying to apply shock value - five sexual attacks (Hannah, Jessica, Chloe, Jessica's friend, Tyler), one suicide, one attempted suicide, an attempted school shooting.
That's not writing about abuse to 'start a conversation', because they could have started the conversation by implying, or even just with the one incident. That's writing about abuse just to shock the audience, make everybody talk about the controversy and therefore make the writers more money.
So writing about abuse can be incredibly hard-hitting and bring the readers on an emotional rollercoaster. But it has to be done tastefully.
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I absolutely adore Toni Morrison. Her writing has always been such an inspiration to me, and The Bluest Eye was definitely an eye opening novel.cristinaro wrote: ↑02 Apr 2018, 05:33 I agree with most of the things you mentioned. I have only one small remark regarding the difficulty of describing abusive situations. I have in mind Toni Morrison's novels Beloved and The Bluest Eye. In Beloved, a mother prefers killing her child for fear of sharing her fate as a slave whereas in The Bluest Eye, a girl is abused and finally raped by her alcoholic father. I watched a video with an interview taken to Toni Morrison about Beloved - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RP6umkgMRq4. What she says is that it was incredibly hard to find the language to describe the story of a mother who was so desperate as to kill her child and that precise moment is so buried in the text that you have problems finding it. For me, Toni Morrison is an incredible writer and she did find the words to touch anyone to tears.
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I think it can be difficult for a writer to write about abuse, whether it's emotional or physical. I know when I was in my creative writing classes I had classmates who included abuse in order to "add drama." It irked me immensely at the time that someone would think of my situation as just a plot device, and if not treated right, I'm sure the reader would feel just as insulted. But I feel that professional authors are becoming more and more responsible in this regard.
- Jacki Mac Iver Hill
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And although it's unspoken, the messages are the same with physical and sexual abuse. Usually it hurts the victim more to think the parent would "lie" than to accept the demeaning actions and/or verbiage displayed over and over again.
One of the best ways to heal is to find others who have lived with the same pain but have realized the demeaning abuse wasn't in fact their fault. Even so, knowing it and believing it are two different things. But being around others who have struggled with self-perception can be very enlightening.
Finding people who love you and are reassuring even when you're at your worst helps reverse the thought processes abuse creates. Not keeping the memories bottled up (talking about it) is very therapeutic as well.
You're right!”
- Henry Ford
No amount of guilt can change the past.
No amount of anxiety can change the future.
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