The Family

Discuss the April Book of the Month Shot Down by Steve Snyder.
User avatar
hsimone
Lilimaster of Bookshelves
Posts: 5426
Joined: 17 Jul 2015, 20:19
2018 Reading Goal: 100
2017 Reading Goal: 100
2018 Reading Goal Completion: 86
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 96
Currently Reading: Lair of Dreams
Bookshelf Size: 445
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-hsimone.html
Latest Review: The Slippery Slope of Consequences by Nati Carrillo
Publishing Contest Votes: 27

The Family

Post by hsimone » 01 Apr 2016, 09:58

When men fought in wars, their families (wives, children, significant others, parents, etc.) would be left behind waiting to hear any piece of information to ensure their man's safety.

How would you compare the bravery/strength of the people left behind to those who went into war? Who do you think has to be stronger? Do both sides have to be strong? Maybe different types of strengths?
"Love is patient, love is kind." -1 Corinthians 13:4

User avatar
Scott
Site Admin
Posts: 3156
Joined: 31 Jul 2006, 23:00
2018 Reading Goal: 52
2017 Reading Goal: 36
2018 Reading Goal Completion: 5
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 25
Favorite Author: Voltairine de Cleyre
Currently Reading: The Woman in the Window
Bookshelf Size: 229
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-scott.html
Reading Device: B00L89V1AA
Publishing Contest Votes: 960
fav_author_id: 2660

Post by Scott » 06 Apr 2016, 08:22

That's true. I think it's hard to compare, like apples and oranges.

It's also incredible how much, in the war in the book, the entire nations would contribute to the war effort through labor and volunteer groups.
"That virtue we appreciate is as much ours as another's. We see so much only as we possess." - Henry David Thoreau

"Non ignara mali miseris succurrere disco." Virgil, The Aeneid

User avatar
hsimone
Lilimaster of Bookshelves
Posts: 5426
Joined: 17 Jul 2015, 20:19
2018 Reading Goal: 100
2017 Reading Goal: 100
2018 Reading Goal Completion: 86
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 96
Currently Reading: Lair of Dreams
Bookshelf Size: 445
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-hsimone.html
Latest Review: The Slippery Slope of Consequences by Nati Carrillo
Publishing Contest Votes: 27

Post by hsimone » 07 Apr 2016, 03:57

It is hard to compare, but I think it takes strength to be left behind on a different level. It seems silly to say, but when my husband has to leave for a week or so for work, it leaves me with discomfort and sadness. However, I know he is safe. Thinking about the women and significant others left behind for so long must have been extremely hard - mentally and emotionally. It is especially difficult if they don't receive a letter from their significant others for a while always wondering if they are alive. Then, the ones who have children always questioning where daddy is can't be easy on their mothers to explain where he is since she might not even know herself.

You raise a good point about those who helped the war effort through labor and volunteer groups. It's amazing and wonderful to hear how people pull together in a time of need.
"Love is patient, love is kind." -1 Corinthians 13:4

User avatar
Taylor Razzani
Posts: 313
Joined: 08 Jan 2016, 19:56
2017 Reading Goal: 55
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 7
Favorite Author: Carlos Ruiz Zafón
Favorite Book: <a href="http://forums.onlinebookclub.org/shelve ... 59294">The Shadow of the Wind (The Cemetery of Forgotten Books)</a>
Currently Reading: The End in All Beginnings
Bookshelf Size: 51
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-taylor-razzani.html
Latest Review: "My Life Before" by Terrell L. Frazier
fav_author_id: 2684

Post by Taylor Razzani » 09 Apr 2016, 12:58

I agree that they display two different types of bravery. The men going off to war were risking their lives and never seeing their loved ones again, which I'm sure was a difficult decision and hard to commit to. And the family members had to go about their day to day lives not knowing the fate of their husbands, lovers, sons, or brothers. Reading through this book I realized how awful that uncertainty would be, I don't think I could handle it as well as they all seemed to.
Latest Review: "My Life Before" by Terrell L. Frazier

User avatar
LivreAmour217
Previous Member of the Month
Posts: 2000
Joined: 02 Oct 2014, 12:42
2018 Reading Goal: 75
2017 Reading Goal: 60
2018 Reading Goal Completion: 81
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 118
Favorite Author: Too many to count
Favorite Book: Ditto
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 249
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-livreamour217.html
Latest Review: How to Build Children with Integrity by Karen Budzinski

Post by LivreAmour217 » 12 Apr 2016, 16:28

Having been on both sides of the issue, I would say that it's a different kind of strength for service members and their families. I think that it's ultimately harder for the service member, but he/she is dealing with being separated from loved ones in addition to the possibility of being physically harmed or even killed. However, all of the worry that goes with having a loved one fighting in a war can take a huge mental toll on spouses, children, and other family members. It's hard all around, really, and there's really no comparing the two.
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." - Albert Einstein

User avatar
gali
Site Admin
Posts: 33255
Joined: 22 Oct 2013, 07:12
2018 Reading Goal: 100
2017 Reading Goal: 100
2018 Reading Goal Completion: 120
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 105
Favorite Author: Agatha Christie
Currently Reading: Mine
Bookshelf Size: 1873
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-gali.html
Reading Device: B00I15SB16
fav_author_id: 2484

Post by gali » 14 Apr 2016, 08:40

I agree with you all. I think both were brave, and each contributed his part to the war effort.
In the case of good books, the point is not to see how many of them you can get through, but rather how many can get through to you." (Mortimer J. Adler)

User avatar
Kia
Posts: 328
Joined: 19 Feb 2016, 17:40
2017 Reading Goal: 50
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 0
Currently Reading: Eye of the world
Bookshelf Size: 39
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-kia.html
Latest Review: "Churchill's Assassin" by John Righten

Post by Kia » 14 Apr 2016, 14:13

It really is so hard to compare the two because they're in two totally different categories of "brave". On the one hand is the bravery of walking into almost certain death in order to defend what you believe in. On the other hand is the bravery of going about your daily life not knowing if your loved one is alive and safe at that very moment. Or perhaps knowing for a fact that they aren't.
"Yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it you can either run from it, or learn from it."- Rafiki
Latest Review: "Churchill's Assassin" by John Righten

User avatar
bookowlie
Special Discussion Leader
Posts: 7718
Joined: 25 Oct 2014, 09:52
2017 Reading Goal: 52
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 50
Favorite Book: The Lost Continent
Currently Reading:
Bookshelf Size: 321
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-bookowlie.html
Latest Review: The Dating Policy by Suzanne Eglington

Post by bookowlie » 15 Apr 2016, 12:17

It is so true that it's comparing apples and oranges. I do think the service members in combat have to be incredibly courageous and deal with very dangerous conditions. Hands down, they have to make split-second life and death decisions as compared with the family members on the homefront.

I don't want to downplay what the spouses have to deal with. Certainly, the spouses have to live with the fear that their loved ones won't come home and the not knowing what's going on. This was even harder for them before the age of advanced technology where the service members can Skype or communicate more frequently with their loved ones. Years ago, spouses were often thrown into an unfamiliar environment at a young age, living basically alone or with young children at an isolated base far from extended family. They would have to wait for snail mail letters to find out if their loved one was okay. The example of Howard's wife living in a remote place in Texas shows what the spouses have to deal with - young, raising your first baby alone, being in the middle of nowhere.
"I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship" - Louisa May Alcott

User avatar
Vermont Reviews
Posts: 1475
Joined: 02 Apr 2016, 09:52
2017 Reading Goal: 300
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 32
Favorite Book: <a href="http://forums.onlinebookclub.org/shelve ... 4468">Scam Prevention</a>
Currently Reading: A Roadmap To Career Success
Bookshelf Size: 509
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-vermont-reviews.html
Latest Review: "Book Blueprint" by Jacqui Pretty
Reading Device: B00IKPYKWG

Post by Vermont Reviews » 15 Apr 2016, 15:01

Bravery is so very important thank God for those who serve in the military.
Latest Review: "Book Blueprint" by Jacqui Pretty

User avatar
Rachaelamb1
Posts: 984
Joined: 07 Mar 2015, 01:58
2017 Reading Goal: 60
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 25
Favorite Author: CS Lewis
Favorite Book: <a href="http://forums.onlinebookclub.org/shelve ... onwitch</a>
Currently Reading: Falling Star
Bookshelf Size: 128
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-rachaelamb1.html
Latest Review: "Dragon Born" by Ela Lourenco

Post by Rachaelamb1 » 19 Apr 2016, 23:09

I can't imagine having my husband go away to war, but while that would be extremely difficult for me, he would be the one in much more difficult position. Of course things were different back then like bookowlie mentioned.
Latest Review: "Dragon Born" by Ela Lourenco

User avatar
lmoses
Posts: 211
Joined: 19 Apr 2016, 16:20
2017 Reading Goal: 200
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 0
Bookshelf Size: 41
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-lmoses.html
Latest Review: "Incandescent" by Shannon Avangeline

Post by lmoses » 24 Apr 2016, 00:36

As a military wife, I think being part of a military family takes a different kind of strength compared to being active duty. My husband and I have both discussed how different life would be if our roles were switched: I could NEVER do his job and endure what he does while he admits that he could NEVER be left behind to do what I do when he is gone. Both sides have to be strong and rely on each other to be successful in the military life.
Latest Review: "Incandescent" by Shannon Avangeline

User avatar
Veda
Posts: 21
Joined: 26 Apr 2016, 11:56
Bookshelf Size: 14
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-veda.html
Latest Review: "Antique Mirror" by D.F.Jones

Post by Veda » 26 Apr 2016, 20:43

lmoses wrote:As a military wife, I think being part of a military family takes a different kind of strength compared to being active duty. My husband and I have both discussed how different life would be if our roles were switched: I could NEVER do his job and endure what he does while he admits that he could NEVER be left behind to do what I do when he is gone. Both sides have to be strong and rely on each other to be successful in the military life.
I can totally relate as my Uncle is in the Indian Navy and sometimes he will be gone for months and we would have no way to contact him. When I was younger and living in India, our whole family had a huge house and my immediate family and extended family all lived together as a "joint family". Sometimes due to weather conditions, they would not have made it back to port on the day they are supposed to and even if my uncle was 1 day late and not called from camp to tell us he is on his way home, the tension and worry would escalate at our house.

We have some members of the family who accept my uncle's role in the Indian Navy and some who don't. I have had many conversations with him and support and understand the choices he has made and am proud of him for it. I find it is a little easier to cope when you understand their motivations and reasoning.
Latest Review: "Antique Mirror" by D.F.Jones

User avatar
grace-grace13
Posts: 18
Joined: 11 Jun 2015, 22:59
2017 Reading Goal: 200
2017 Reading Goal Completion: 0
Currently Reading: Why not me?
Bookshelf Size: 16
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-grace-grace13.html

Post by grace-grace13 » 27 Apr 2016, 13:53

It is not easy to compare the horrors of war to the horrors of the home front of military families. Both sides have to be brave and strong but in different ways. Soldiers have to deal with less than ideal conditions and scarring realties of war, while families have to get by without their loved one(s) and wait to hear if there family member is okay. I am from a military family and there is a ton of stress but on the family when a loved one is gone. Tensions run high and relationships suffer when a family member is gone. However, the family members of soldiers are some of the strongest people you will ever meet.

CrescentMoon
Posts: 1014
Joined: 08 May 2014, 22:50
Currently Reading: Apollo's Raven
Bookshelf Size: 72
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-crescentmoon.html
Latest Review: "Letorian Descendants- Casey Blane Series (Book 1)" by Jodi Ann Fahey

Post by CrescentMoon » 02 May 2016, 13:54

This is a hard question. It is really hard to compare the things these two people have to go through because they have to deal with such different things. Going to war and knowing that everyday there is a possibility you may lose your life or be horribly injured takes a lot of strength and bravery. However, I can't imagine the fear and worry and constant concern of the family members left behind. Everyday they must be worried sick just waiting if their loved ones will come back home in one piece or not. I don't know if I can definitively say who has it worse but one thing for sure is that both sides definitely have to be strong.
Latest Review: "Letorian Descendants- Casey Blane Series (Book 1)" by Jodi Ann Fahey

Metka
Posts: 26
Joined: 28 Apr 2016, 09:46
Favorite Book: <a href="http://forums.onlinebookclub.org/shelve ... 80">Mutant Message Down Under</a>
Currently Reading: Forever in your Embrace
Bookshelf Size: 26
Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-metka.html

Post by Metka » 05 May 2016, 05:35

Yes, both sides had to be strong. The ones who left and their relatives. The II. world war was terrible. So many people lost contact with their relatives and friends. So many were hiding... The chaos separated people, but those that survived found their way back to normal life. Off course, If they could. Some were left with huge scars of war. That can last a lifetime. And their families also. They did not even know if their loved ones were alive.. It's hard to imagine the horrible things they had to experience... My grandparents told me a lot about those times. Definitely, they all had to be as strong as possible.

Post Reply

Return to “"Shot Down" by Steve Snyder”