People treat you how you treat them?

Discuss the December 2015 book of the month Burn Zones by Jorge P. Newbery.
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Scott
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People treat you how you treat them?

Post by Scott »

One theme I enjoy from the December book of the month, Burn Zones, is the idea that people will treat you how you treat them.

Jorge P. Newbery says as much a few times in Burn Zones. It is also demonstrated by the punk rockers in his parents house and for me most notably by the tough Ricky who helped Jorge retrieve his spilled coins.

Do you find this is also true in your experience? I do.

In fact, it seems to me the people who get treated poorly due to stereotypes and prejudice tend to respond kindly to respectful treatment even more than more up-tight people. I suppose they are so used to being treated poorly that even a moderate amount of respect and kindness goes a long way for them and is much appreciated.

I use to be a waiter and bartender for years. Unfortunately, servers tend to be very prejudiced, thinking certain types of people don't tip as well or give more trouble to the server. However, I think a lot of these prejudices are really self-fulfilling: If you treat the customer worse because you don't expect a good tip or are annoyed to have to take care of that kind of customer, is it any surprise that then the customer is not as nice as the customers you treat better? I'd say most of my best customers and best tips were from people who would be stereotyped as not being the best customers, and I think that's because they appreciated the good service that they rarely get. People who are used to getting the world handed to them on a silver platter probably won't appreciate it as much. What do you think?

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Post by joanofarc2015 »

when i first read the topic, i thought of Confucius XD nowadays, i do see people treat others based on prejudice/ stereotypes. i think a lot of that roots from the media
TV and (yes even books) have underling implications that state "its normal and ok to judge others so treat them this way and that way"
so promotion of making judgement an equal judgement is great and how an author (of TV scripts, books, etc) highlights that should help make the world better place ;) (bow)
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Post by literaturelover »

I do find this to be true and I practice it everyday. Of course it doesn't always work, some people are dill holes no matter how nice you are to them, but overall I've found that the world is a reciprocal place. I was a cashier at a grocery store throughout high school and college and I always had a smile on my face and a kind word for everyone who went through my line. It paid itself forward eventually and the crappy customers eventually started treating me and my fellow cashiers with respect. The world needs a little more of this philosophy applied in everyday life, which probably means you probably read Burn Zones ;)
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Post by gali »

I agree. I always treat people with respect and politeness, and it works in most cases.
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Post by Unsa Malik »

I still believe if you treat someone with love respect and care even the most arrogant people do melt . Because no hate lasts long enough to endure the purity of love .
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Post by Morgan_Malone »

In general I think that if you treat people with kindness and respect you will get the same in return. However, I don't think this is always the case. I think there are people that we encounter that no matter how nice you are to them they won't treat you with the same kindness.
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Post by Heidi M Simone »

I find this is absolutely true. I, like others here, apply this every day - treat others the way you would like to be treated. I personally like to be treated with respect, so I show respect.

I used to work as a cashier in different stores/pharmacies during high school and college, and I found that I rarely had any issues with customers. If there ever was an issue and they wanted to speak with a manager, it was almost never about how I treated them, it was mostly about the product. If there was a customer who found something to complain about me, my manager would always back me up, knowing that these customers' words only go so far. I believe these customers would be those uptight people you were referencing, Scott :wink:
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Post by eunice2868 »

Wherever possible I will try to treat others nice. (Hoping that in return others will treat me nice. :)) :wink:

I agree absolutely with Zig Ziglar -

"Life is an echo. What you send out comes back. What you sow, you reap. What you give, you get. What you see in others, exists in you." :greetings-wavingyellow:
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Post by Heidi M Simone »

Couldn't have put it better myself! :clap:
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Post by psyche »

I think you have to at least give people the chance to interact on the basis of kindness and respect. Even if it doesn't work out, you know you tried.
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Post by stoppoppingtheP »

In general treating people respectfully and kindly will result in you being treated the same way. However, there are some people who think that in order to get anywhere in life you need to put yourself first, even if it means trampling on others to get there.

“there have been so many times
i have seen a man wanting to weep
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beat his heart until it was unconscious.

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Post by CzechTigg »

It's a funny one really. Some people seem suspicious of open warmth, and prefer formality. Often I know only with hindsight. I try to be decent most of the time but can be irritable, so may seem like I don't follow this mantra. But we are only human. I always give someone a second chance, unless they are clearly bad news.
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Post by charysma_lilly »

Showing kindness and being polite with others is a sign of respect towards one's person. Some don't even care about that... I try to keep a smile on my face most of the time. The theme is quite present in the book and it makes a good addition to other intresting aspects.
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Post by L_Therese »

In my experience, treating someone with the same courtesy that you would like to receive doesn't always garner the desired result, but treating someone poorly will nearly always provoke a response in kind. It seems a far better idea to err on the side of kindness and respect in the hopes of reciprocation.
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Post by tracy19 »

I totally agree with that sentiment. As the saying goes "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you".
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