LIES

Use this forum to post poetry that you have written. This is for getting comments and constructive feedback. This is for original, creative works. You must post the actual text, no links. Only one poem per topic please.
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LanieTaj
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LIES

Post by LanieTaj »

Can you make some feedbacks or recommendations? I'm accepting negative feedbacks for my improvement.

LIES

Every guy
Expectation is high
That checks on us like a fire
And talking too much lies.

'I like you', First lie
'Can I court you', Another falsify
Could you guys' be considerate
And don't make us discombobulate?

'Will you be mine', Third lie
And then we buy
And lately we cry
That cause our heart,
Soon to die.
Latest Review: The Barnyard Buddies STOP for Peace by Julie Penshorn
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Lincolnshirelass
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Joined: 30 Oct 2017, 04:36
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Post by Lincolnshirelass »

I like this - terse and expressive. It also occurs to me it would work well with a musical track ...
An Eye for an Eye only ends up making the whole world blind.

Mahatma Gandhi
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