Refugee Child

[Lincolnshirelass]

Your eyes have seen what nobody should see,
and it has drilled a darkness, bewildered and yet wise
where the carefreeness of childhood ought to be ....

A feral fear that nothing can disguise,
a thwarted hope that won't entirely die,
even as all around you rots and dies,

And you have passed beyond the question, why,
beyond the concept of deserved, or fair,
your ears still haunted by your mother's cry.

Because, yes, once, you knew a mother's care,
and dare not think about where she is now,
but mouth her name to cruel and salty air ....

I will keep you safe, had been her vow,
and she could not, but it is not her fault,
men and the sea are cruel, and there was no way how ....

And so you breath in sour despair and salt,
yet still you pray, Lord, don't let this life halt.

[ladycraic]

This poem is nicely written! I love the structure and the flow. Thanks for letting me feel the pain of a refugee child, even if only for a few minutes.

[Master Reviews]

Very well written. Although I usually like poems to have a more set type of rhythm patterns, you dont stray away from your own unique pattern. The imagery stands out as well.

[DATo]

@Lincolnshirelass - You consistently amaze me with the quality of your poems. I have come to the conclusion that you are incapable of writing a bad one.

My only suggestion would be to maybe rework the ending couplet. It's fine as it stands but the last sentence seems to be stretching to find a rhyme with "salt". Also, I'm guessing that the word you wanted in the second-to-last sentence was "breathe" rather than "breath" .... but I may be wrong.

Thanks for sharing another fine poem with us!

[Lincolnshirelass]

Thanks all for your kind comments. @DATo, I've said it before and will say it again, you're psychic. You're right that I WAS trying to find a rhyme for salt, as I'd committed to a rhyming structure and didn't want to lose the image but it IS laboured! You're also quite right about my breath/breath slip-up!