Reflection of life

Use this forum to post poetry that you have written. This is for getting comments and constructive feedback. This is for original, creative works. You must post the actual text, no links. Only one poem per topic please.
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Ammu24
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Reflection of life

Post by Ammu24 » 29 Sep 2015, 05:54

I went up the narrow winding stairs

and came out in the desolated field.

The plants that sprung up the minute

my foot touched the ground .

The whole field, what is this?


I thought to myself with amazement still lingering .

Ah! I realized in a minutes, the field,

As the mind of a human being .

And the plants on the field I recognized

as the feeling of mind the sweet flowers,

Which covered on side, went the thought of happiness .

In the trees I recognized the kindness

which benefits others. Ah? On the

other side what I saw made me sad .


Oh! I saw the land covered with rocks

it gave the ilk appearance of a barren land.

The barren land was indeed the sorrow,

The nettles, which was seen in abundance,

reminded me of the cruelty, jealousy and

other evil intention of the mind .


The middle of the field was a beautiful lake .

covered with weeds and marshy was the

appearance in one side of the lake.

The lake on the other side was

indeed a picture to the seen.

To the lake I walked unthinkingly .


I looked in to the marshy side,

it was the sin committed by the person.

Oh! its my mind i realized.

I was shattered beyond words .

for my sins appears to be numerous.

Relief beyond words were poured the

minute I saw the surface of

the beautiful lake on the other side .


I understood that this was the lake

‘Reflection of Life’ which analyses us.

I prayed to God to wash away my sins.

Lo! Miracle of miracles a light spread

From the middle of Lake it spread

Like air I felt happiness surroundings.

Oh! I was woken by the beam of sunlight

Was I dreaming for I was in my bed

I understand that this was the test of Lord.



P.s: I wrote this 10 years back in my schooldays.I have not yet written anything this lengthy again. I am wondering whether to start writing again or not. Also English is my second language.

Akosua +
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Post by Akosua + » 29 May 2018, 12:24

U must continue writing dear. This is such an inspiring poem. U can focus mainly on Christians if u want. I liked it very much

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sarkash
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Post by sarkash » 29 May 2018, 12:32

Yeaaaahhhhh it is hearttouching...deeply sensed poetry

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Ammu24
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Post by Ammu24 » 08 Jun 2018, 05:40

Thank you 😀

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KatSims92
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Post by KatSims92 » 28 Jun 2018, 11:10

This was so lovely, and I agree that it could be inspirational to lots of spiritually-minded people. I love the imagery and how each image has a deeper meaning. Great work!

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Ammu24
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Post by Ammu24 » 30 Jun 2018, 14:16

Thank you for your encouragement 😀

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palilogy
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Post by palilogy » 02 Jul 2018, 11:23

I think you should keep writing.
You are very good with images and bringing that vivid feeling to the reader =)

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