Clutches of dawn I

Use this forum to post short stories that you have written. This is for getting comments and constructive feedback. This is for original, creative works. You must post the actual text, no links.
Post Reply
User avatar
rookie_nda
Posts: 1
Joined: 13 Feb 2018, 12:44
Bookshelf Size: 0

Clutches of dawn I

Post by rookie_nda » 13 Feb 2018, 13:01

Clutching the bed sheet to my chest, I stretched my hand out... The universal sign for money. He looked up at me as he hopped on one foot putting on his trouser's.
"Sweet baby ha anh! Did I say I wont give you your money?" Rolling my eyes at him I pushed my hair out of my face with one hand.
"Give me my money oga. I don't have time to waste abeg." Looking at him I felt a rush of emotions course through my body. Disgust, hate, regret and mostly anger at myself, this man and mostly world for pushing me into this. The sound of him counting money brought my attention back to him.
"Take..." He said dropping the money on the bed.
"What is that?" I asked eyeing the #200 and #100 notes suspiciously. He opened his mouth in laughter exposing his brown teeth.
"#5000" He answered still laughing. I pulled the notes to myself and counted. Satisfied with the amount I dropped the bed sheet from my naked body and made to pull on my clothes. I could feel him shamelessly staring at my nude form. Putting on my shoes I stood up and left the room.

Outside the hotel I stopped a commercial motorcycle that'll take me home.
"Home, I laughed inwardly ...very funny name to call that place.

"Anty Christie, Aunty Christie..." The half-naked children chorused as we cruised into the dinghy area where I lived. Dropping down from the bike I stepped carefully to avoid the pot holes in the road that led to the face me I face you where I lived. Upon entering the house I was greeted with the putrid smell of urine obviously coming from the latrines. Mama Ene a fat, boisterous woman with a charasterically loud mouth held court In the compound while the other young girls sat around her and listened to her stories of her past lovers... Not in the mood for her over exaggerated stories I smiled at the group halfheartedly and open my door. Ducking my head into the small apartment i breathed in the fresh smell of the lavender air freshener that i use.

Hastily pulling off my clothes I tied a wrapper across my chest just as a knock sounded on the door. Grimacing inwardly I made my way to the door but the sight that greeted me brought a smile to my face. A young girl of fifteen years of age stood on my threshold. Her big brown eyes framed her otherwise lean face. Her caramel coloured skin was one of the other reasons that made people to refer her as black American.

"Auntie Chris." She said smiling as I turned to go inside indicating that she follow. Sitting down on my mattress I beckoned to her to do the same.
"You didn't come back yesterday night?" She asked a frown marring her beautiful face.
"work.." I said simply not needing to elaborate.
"Oh..." She mumbled then kept quiet. The silence that followed carried a mountain of unspoken words. A sudden need to fill the silence shook me.
"How was school? Did you go today?"
"Yes" She said looking into my eyes. No...I screamed inwardly.
"You...you...w...went to...to school?" I stuttered. I said a silent prayer in my mind that she was still talking about school. She shook her head as tears filled her eyes.
"I'm pregnant auntie...Pregnant for my father."

User avatar
DATo
Previous Member of the Month
Posts: 3483
Joined: 31 Dec 2011, 07:54
Bookshelf Size: 0
Location: U.S.A.

Post by DATo » 13 Feb 2018, 13:10

You write well rookie. This was a tragic yet beautifully written story. My compliments to you.

Thank you for sharing your work with us.
“I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed reading accident. I hit a book mark and flew across the room.”
― Steven Wright

Post Reply

Return to “Creative Original Works: Short Stories”