A little pour girl who wants to exchange her family by money and will discover that family is more important than fortu

Use this forum to post short stories that you have written. This is for getting comments and constructive feedback. This is for original, creative works. You must post the actual text, no links.
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Jasmine-Fati 20
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A little pour girl who wants to exchange her family by money and will discover that family is more important than fortu

Post by Jasmine-Fati 20 »

:roll: :oops: Anna was a little beautiful girl. She belongs to a pour family. The little girl wasn't satisfied with her family situation. Anna used to tell herself that parents who don't have money are useless. They can't dominate a better life to their children. One day she met a gangsta on her way to school. He offered her a lot of money if she gave him her address. Anna wasn't aware of what would happen next. She did, and the bad man kept his promise. Anna took the money and enjoyed spending them on what she desired to get. She started living alone and didn't ask about her parents. Day after day she started feeling alone and she missed her parents . She precipitated and finally realized how much parents are important. Money couldn't give her happiness like her parents did even though they were pour . She regretted what she did and looked for the gangsta and she didn't found him. It was too late and unfortunately she couldn't get her family back again.
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Melshida
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Post by Melshida »

The story is well written and it really shows the importance of family. It also show that money can't buy happiness. Even if money is provided it will not make you as happy as your family.
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How are you
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Post by How are you »

This story is like a lesson you learn it shows that you should be thankful for what you have and that adventurally you'll have a successful life to and that just because you want to live in a expensive place or have expensive things you shouldn't give up and say well if this family doesn't get me what I want I'll get it myself no you should find a way to help and get money the correct way. Also, when you make a decision make sure you won't regret it so be careful what you wish for. ☺
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Sanya_farheen_
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Post by Sanya_farheen_ »

The story focuses on what matters more, family or money.
Focus on your grammar a little and it's all good.
And also, there should be a reason why the gangster wants to give Anna money in return of her family. The reason could be that the gangster was Anna's father's rival or something.
But keep up the good work.
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