Being fearless versus learning to control your fears?

Discuss the June 2014 book of the month Divergent by Veronica Roth. While only Divergent--the first book of the series--is the book of the month, feel free to use this subforum to discuss the rest of the series or to talk about the movies, but make sure not to post spoilers unless noted in the topic title.
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IanYanny
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Re: Being fearless versus learning to control your fears?

Post by IanYanny »

I think being fearless is actually a matter of confidence in what you are doing. And being reckless, of course. Meanwhile, learning to control your fears translate to being mature and being able to handle things on your own.
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Post by TheWriteAngel »

I would prefer to be in control of my fears. That would imply that my fears cannot get the best of me and I can turn them to my advantage.
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Post by Helen_Combe »

There is no value in being fearless. Bravery requires someone to be frightened, but to go and do the thing that frightens them regardless.
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Post by AnnaKathleen »

When Tris states "half of bravery is perspective" I think that maybe that her point is that perspective allows you to see that bravery means different things to different people. Acts of bravery can be big or small. Everyone is capable of being brave. "Fearless" has this untouchable quality to it that, to me, almost gives the impression of lacking perspective, and taking for granted humanity. I think if someone is truly fearless they have lost sight of things. They no longer see or consider if something is dangerous or what impact a choice may have on someone or something around them. They no longer see individuals or appreciate differences in acts and in opinions. They have this blanket idea that fearless means no fears and no fears means strength because everyone is the same and fears the same thing. But I don't think anyone can truly be fearless. Fear is a survival instinct that everyone has, it isn't a weakness. It sometimes can be our biggest strength. I think Bravery is admitting you have fears and accepting and overcoming/using them to become stronger whereas Fearless is just refusing to admit that you can be scared and that can be okay.

I hope I made that clear enough. Am I the only one with these thoughts? lol
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Post by jvez »

For me, I think the statement "half of bravery is perspective" means your fears will only grow if you let them. If you think you can make it through, if you think you can win, then there's a higher chance you will. It's okay to acknowledge your fears, it's okay to say you're worried or scared. But learn to tell yourself that you can win over these fears. Being fearless is being in denial of your fears, but being brave involves accepting your own weaknesses but never surrendering to them.
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Post by Crazybud »

toriborip wrote: 04 Jun 2014, 13:24 I think that being fearless is having fear but not letting them control you... I have met very few people that have been able to do this... I'm working on it but I am no where near being fearless
Absolutely! I agree with you.
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Post by sush_destiny »

Being fearless is a fictional concept. Everybody has something to fear, big or small. It is learning to control your fears that is important .
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Post by dorebri2020 »

What is the difference between being fearless and learning to control your fears? Do you believe anyone can be truly fearless? What does Tris mean when she says that “half of bravery is perspective

The difference between being fearless and learning to control fears is the difference between foolishness and courage. If someone is simply fearless, then they are going against the basic nature of humanity by assuming that they have nothing to fear, and there is ALWAYS something to fear. Overcoming fears, however, is a journey that requires courage and strength to succeed. Learning to grow out of fears allows someone to become stronger as a person. Therefore, no one can be truly fearless, only grown out of fears.
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Post by Mallory Whitaker »

If you're fearless, then what do you need bravery for? If you're not scared of something, then you don't need to be brave, you know? Bravery, in and of itself, requires fear because it is about confronting your fears, not simply not having any. Being able to control your fears, that's bravery. Being fearless (if there is such a thing), is usually more about confidence or, at worst, a lack of care about what happens to you.
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Post by Wanja Hannah »

I think fearless sounds more like a "Don't care" attitude while controlling your fears means having confidence in oneself to get over anything that is frightening.
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Post by Nimisha_91 »

Being fearless isn't hard. Its how your born. It just means you don't care about the consequences. Getting over a fear on the other hand requires effort.
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Post by rumik »

It's pretty unrealistic to expect yourself to be completely fearless. Learning how to control your fears is a better option IMO.
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Post by Atara Miles »

I would rather learn to control my fears rather than having none at all. Fear gives you an edge, it makes you more aware and less willing to go off half-cocked because of overconfidence. When you learn to control these fears it's like being leveled up in a game - you have the experience required to overcome more of the same.
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Post by NovaFly »

You can't be brave if you're not scared, thus it is at least half perspective because for example while one person sees climbing a ladder as a mundane task, someone who's scared of heights would be very brave to climb a ladder.
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Post by Julie-p »

All of us have different fears and experiences so I believe that actions that define bravery are relative. Fears sometimes come from rational places, and in my opinion we need to hear them. Though, all of us have fears that sometimes have no explanations, and they are the ones that should be controlled.
I don't believe anyone can or should be fearless.
When Tris says that "half of bravery is perspective" i thinks she means that some actions that you see as brave aren't seen as brave by the one doing them, or the other way around.
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