Was she really independent? Yes, she did her work alone and correctly, but when it came to social interactions she needed Jazz to be there. Even she hid behind Jazz to hide from him at the cafeteria. But later on all these anxious feelings are suppressed just by her sexual needs. What does that make her?
Zia Lennox, is she a sexaholic?
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Re: Zia Lennox, is she a sexaholic?
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I would not label Zia as a typical woman, since I do not believe typical women have a high sexual desire and they get entangled in love triangles (or bigger shapes) just to fulfill their sexual needs. Definitely Zia had a high libido, and it has been supressed by her anxiety disorder and inability to lead a long term relationship. But when Baxter came to her life she changed suddenly, and she simply flied to him just to satisfy her sexual needs. And she did that frequently as well. Can't we name her a sexaholic for this behaviour?Tushar Swami wrote: ↑11 Aug 2021, 08:41 Zia represents a typical woman who has her own needs and desires. She gets intimate with people she likes and I would not refer to her as a sexaholic because of that. Her high sex drive makes her a better partner, not a sex addict.
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Sexaholic is a one who is addicted to sex. When you are in an addiction you are simply succumbed to that with or without your will. Yes, you raise an important point. Zia is afraid to say 'no', and some of her sexual encounters occurred simply because this. And we see howshe enjoyed these encounters. So, I agree, if she is not already a sexaholic (butI think she already is), her character qualities and her sex appeal will definitely make her one in the future.Bernadette Avelar wrote: ↑11 Aug 2021, 09:12 Zia has a fear of rejection and carries anxiety about rejection. She has a sexual appetite and is confident about sex but I do not think she has crossed the line of being a sexaholic yet. However, because she is so impressionable and afraid to say no, I do think she has a future of becoming one.
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Unfortunately, in a patriarchal world where women are vilified for being too sexually adventurous, such ladies may be termed as being sexaholics.
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Initial connection with Bryce went that way, yes, Zia had lustful emotions towards him from the beginning. Since Bryce did not give much reason for her arousal at that moment we can think of Zia as a woman with high libido. But how can that make her decision a correct one when she decided to go to Baxter to fulfill her sexual needs? Do all women who are with high libido cheat on their lovers?
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Zia was not ashamed to explore through her sesexual desires, I agree. But she was not ashamed to cheat her lover to fulfill her sexual desires from another man. If she was a confident woman she should (or could) have confessed her sexual needs and desires to Bryce, and I don't think he would not have fulfilled them. But Zia chose to go to another man, and then to few more after that. I would rather call such a woman a sexaholic than a confident one.
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She would have had multiple relationships (multiple sexual relationships) if her anxiety disorder did not protect her. She fantasised for months on Baxter even before meeting him. This shows how lustful she was. And that lust was the blind that prevented her from seeing any red flag signs. Will an ordinary woman harbour such a passion and fantasise about a man that she never met if her libido was in a limit which is unusual? Won't that make her a sexaholic?SarahJean7 wrote: ↑11 Aug 2021, 15:00 If she was a sexaholic, she would be having sex with multiple people. I think she developed this special connection with Baxter and when they met face to face, her libido took over after months of thinking about this man. I struggled liking her at times because of her bad choices with Baxter. She’s supposedly a very smart woman, but couldn’t see the red flags?
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I can agree with that. Yes, she needed relationships in her life, but she never could go towards anyone beyond Jazz because of her anxiety issue. So when she felt that she could ease up into Bryce she was happy and she loved him. But then only her hidden desires surfaced and lust was among them. Then she felt Bryce's love and care was simply not enough and she needed a passionate, juicy relationship. Then she made a wrong choice and turned towards Baxter, which ultimately became, as you said, a counterproductive measure.Katherine Smith wrote: ↑11 Aug 2021, 16:24 I think that humans crave connection with others regardless of whether they are an introvert or an extrovert. I think that in Zia's case, she wants her relationships to have meaning and have a deeper emotional impact. The way that she goes about achieving this goal is counter productive as seen in the example of getting involved in a love triangle with people who are hiding secrets.
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Enjoying sex is a good thing, especially for a long term relationship, or marriage. But Zia's case was different. She craved for sex but she didn't get it from Bryce. So she turned towards Baxter. Yes, she enjoyed that, but that does not lessen the severity of her fault. Her sexual behaviour was not healthy, and she had to face the repercussions too.Ivy Mokote wrote: ↑12 Aug 2021, 10:22I don't think Zia is a sexaholic. That is too extreme a term to use on her. A sexaholic would imply someone who has sex all the time, this is not the case with Zia. However, Does she enjoy sex, yes. I think that's good. Especially with women who are attracted to their partners, it is an especially good thing. This should be encouraged instead of frowned upon.
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She is not attracted to one lover but to two, and that is the issue. She loved Bryce but she needed not only love in return but also sexual satisfaction. If she was confident and not afraid, as you said, she should have conveyed her thoughts and needs to Bryce. But she chose to go to another lover letting herself entangled in a love triangle. I would rather say she behaved recklessly than bravely.Muna Chizzy wrote: ↑12 Aug 2021, 19:00 I won't say she is a sexaholic. She is attracted to her lover and she has a high sexual appeal. She knows what she want and she is not afraid to go for it.
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Addiction can be defined as when you crave for something other than any other pleasure, and you require it in higher amounts gradually, and you continue to do it despite the knowledge of having bad effects of it, etc. Though the features of addiction to a drug cannot be fully applied to sex-addict, I think Zia fulfilled some out of these criteria, especially continuing the sexual relationship with Baxter knowing very well that it was bad and it may carry consequences, just to fulfill her sexual fantasies. I think that is more or less enough to call her a sexaholic.