5 out of 5 stars
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In this book, we walk through Stewart Nelson Dell’s shoes since he was a mere toddler and everything that happened to him throughout his life. Stewart was an unknown sex addict and a liar for most of his life. At the young age of five, he became comfortable with lying when he admitted to doing something wrong but still got a severe punishment. He didn’t believe the punishment fit the crime, especially after telling the truth. We learn how he met Tami and how their relationship started immediately upon meeting each other, as the sparks flew the instant their eyes met. Unfortunately, this isn’t a romance novel or a straightforward love story. This nonfiction book is based on true events as Stewart remembers them, but it reads like a very intense and intriguing novel.
After Stewart met Tami, we saw glimpses of her life and struggles as well. We learn what was hiding behind the world’s most famous pornstar, who was merely a teenager. After realizing how much they actually had in common, with both of them working in the porn industry as teenagers, and the probabilities that led their lives to where they were, they were shocked about their possible discoveries and eye-openers. Both were trying to get out of the porn industry, and one evening Stewart saw a news story about the President of the United States starting a campaign against porn—a literal war against porn had begun—and this pulled at his strings.
Being sexually abused is very traumatizing and can lead to a lot of problems that we don’t even realize can be associated with trauma, like, for example, stuttering and even sometimes sexual kinks. Trauma victims also sometimes bury what happened to them far in the back of their minds to try and get away from what was done to them. The statistics are also very high, showing that most sexual abuse happens by family members or close friends. This book addressed a lot of these issues and explored the theory that a lot of people working in the porn industry had probably been sexually abused when they were younger. It is a very scary thought if you look at how big the porn industry is.
How do you take that power back when you have gone through something so traumatic? How does this affect you mentally, and how can you get out of that depressive state? Was it your own fault that you were raped? Does being raped make you a slut? I believe that there are a few legit questions, as being raped or sexually abused is sometimes misunderstood and widely thrown out of context, or even shoved aside as not important. This book is very thought-provoking and also scary in a way. I applaud Stewart and Tami for what they tried to achieve! This was no easy feat, and they knew they would get a lot of backlash for going against porn, especially as both of them were part of it for a while in their lives. Stewart said in one of his conversations with Tami that he learned emotional disassociation as protection from basically everything in his life, and he thought of it as a survival skill, although it might not be the healthiest way to handle it.
There was nothing I disliked about this book. I enjoyed everything in this book, but the parts that I enjoyed the most were the different internal struggles that were revealed and the things discussed between Stewart and Tami. They answered all of my questions and ponderings with their deep discussions. I was surprised at how exactly the porn industry worked, and this book did not miss any details or steps. Everything was laid bare for dissection.
I would rate Lolita Logic by Stewart Nelson Dell a perfect 5 out of 5 stars. I did find a few errors in this book, but they didn’t take any pleasure away from my reading. I would recommend this book to mature people who are open-minded about profanities and explicit language, especially due to the scenarios described in this book, which involve porn and sexual abuse. There are a few explicit scenes discussed that are not appropriate for anyone under eighteen years of age or if you struggle with these topics. I believe anyone from the free-love or hippie era would enjoy this book and be able to relate to it more, especially if you were somewhere in your life pulled into the porn industry or intrigued by it. This book dissects a lot of deep topics.
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Lolita Logic
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