What appears to be ridiculous may result in scepticism to an important topic of interest. When something appears ‘too’ simple to do, it raises red flags in the minds of most people. This is because a lot of people tend to doubt or distrust the simple. Their brains are wired to think that life is hard and complex and that everything in life must be just as hard and complex. These are often people who have had it hard in life and ‘expect’ to always have it hard. This includes those who have been victims of deception at so many points in their lives that they have a problem trusting everything and anything, everyone and anyone. They do not believe that things can go right for them, they believe that everything in life is out to get them, whatever they do—and who knows, maybe everyone as well.
But the truth about life is not that it isn't complex or that it isn't simple, it is that it can be simple while being complex and complex while being simple. Phrased differently, it is not so complex that our brains cannot understand it and not so simple to the point of banality that we cannot pause and wonder at the world around us. Often, it is not the complexity we marvel at, it is how it can be so complex and yet so simple at the same time. Its complexity is in what we see and its simplicity in our ability to ponder, understand, and sync up with it. When we marvel, it is because we are aware of this ability. Sometimes, understanding the wonder of the world we live in lies in grasping the wonderfulness of our being alive.
It is as simple as that: this world is simple, we are beings of simplicity, and that's what this book is about. If Phobia Relief: From Fear to Freedom by Kalliope Barlis could be described in one word, that would be ‘common sense,’ and the latter is just another way of referring to that which is simple, clear, and obvious before our very eyes. A Licensed Master Trainer of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), she is taking the commonsense approach to solving phobias, with remarkable simplicity and a technique reinforced by theoretical soundness. When it comes to Bandler and Barlis’ Neuro-Linguistic Programming, the end of scepticism marks the beginning of the inflow of wisdom for living what the stoics call ‘the good life.’ With NLP, you don’t argue, you simply apply and see what happens. Facts are facts and the results speak for themselves.
Neuro-Linguistic Programming is a powerful interventional, psychotherapeutic, drug-free approach that attempts to build ‘a set of transferable skills by programming the unconscious mind,’ repatterning the brain. Based on the 1975 work of Richard Bandler and John Grindler, and the combined results of forty years of painstaking research and lecturing by top members of the NLP community of which Kalliope is a part, it is far from being ‘mere talk.’ As the formal discipline for ‘the study and use of successful behavior,’ it is a field in its own right, and Phobia Relief is, in one sense, a capturing of the authoress’ uncommon understanding and refined application of the work of its main proponent to the persistent issue of phobic distresses. Her mentor, it is he Dr. Bandler, who writes the foreword for this book, endorsing it.
At this point, I must pause to emphasise the fact that Neuro-Linguistic Programming is not one of those lame, unfounded, sugarcoated pseudosciences; its scientific grounding is unquestionable. Excellently and confidently written, filled with practical skills and wisdom that anyone can use to change their lives, this book should not be seen as ‘just another self-help book.’ It details the basis and workings of a discipline. Its tone is comfortably informal and instances of typographical errors are minimal. One may even say that the informal mode of expression adopted by its authoress excuses any error that may be found in it.
Grateful for all I have been able to learn from it, I gladly award this book five out of five stars. Not one for passive readers, it is for those who are willing and ready to take control of their lives. It is a massive call to action for sufferers of all kinds of phobias to stand up to what they fear and reverse the response—from flight to a more conscious reality check. This book is for all who desire to defeat their most irrational fears and live a more purposeful and productive life, growing each day in beautiful, unexpected ways.
‘It’s not what is feared that matters, it’s how it is feared.’
Phobia Relief: From Fear to Freedom by Kalliope Barlis, 2016: pg. 13.
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Phobia Relief
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