Review of Nice People Finish First
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[Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Nice People Finish First" by Paul Wright.]
Author Paul Wright is 77 years old and has been a mental health professional for 50 years. While studying to become a Methodist minister in college, Wright encountered some unattractive and unloving attitudes in the church he was serving. He found these attitudes so disdainful that he switched his major and became a psychotherapist. Over time, the author solidified his core belief in God and separated it from other religious practices that seemed contradictory.
As he helped his clients with their issues, he also searched for help when he faced losses and devastating circumstances in his own life. Wright noticed five principles, coined H.A.L.F.S., that help a person live a more peaceful life by improving their relationship with themself and others, and he shares them in Nice People Finish First.
This book reads as if you are having a series of conversations with Wright in his office—not as a patient, but as a valued friend with whom he wants to share his observations. The quality most apparent in the author, and one the writing focuses on, is humility: recognizing that we are valuable and everyone else is equally treasured. That healthy acknowledgment of the worth of all life establishes the foundation of his H.A.L.F.S. principles.
Two fundamental principles are forgiveness and the previously mentioned humility. The author stresses that by focusing on the first four attributes, spirituality is often a natural by-product. He skillfully negotiates this last component, recognizing the many ways to embrace spirituality. I will leave the reader to uncover the remaining two principles when they pick up their copy of this book.
The breadth of the examples referenced in this read reveals Wright’s varied interests and receptivity to the thoughts and actions of those around him. He includes revelations from his personal experiences and those of his friends and clients (names changed and with permission, of course). But he was inspired to write this book by watching the U.S. women’s artistic gymnastics team compete—and succeed—at the 2012 Summer Olympic Games in London. He noticed they were both competitive and supportive; they were nice, and they were successful. They combated the stress of this elite situation by having a healthy relationship with themselves (training to be in their top form) and with their teammates (respecting and honoring their achievements).
I appreciated the author’s intentional effort to include different religious views in the text. His worldview as a Christian formed the basis of his thinking; however, he cited examples from other religions, including atheism, which were informative and highlighted common themes across the spectrum. For instance, I reflected deeply on Buddhist scholar Sri Sri Ravi Shankar’s statement about forgiveness: “The person whom you are forgiving should not even be aware that you are forgiving them.” This view complements my Christian understanding of forgiveness.
I also respected Wright’s authenticity. (No, that is not the A in H.A.L.F.S.) He mentioned that in his earlier writing, he was hesitant to include references to his alcoholism, but his sobriety and insights gained from participating in Alcoholics Anonymous, particularly the spiritual component, were critical in honing the H.A.L.F.S. approach. I believe his honesty stems from humility.
The lack of professional editing was the only negative aspect of my reading experience. The author’s delivery was engaging, but when I approached the last 20 pages of this 168-page book, the writing lost focus and repeated some concepts. I flipped back to check the table of contents and found that one did not exist. The absence of the structural reminder of a table of contents explained the meandering flow, which had been noticeable but not distracting until that point. Professional editing would also have been helpful in correcting the missing words and changing sentence structure throughout the read.
I rate Nice People Finish First3 out of 4 stars, deducting a star for the editing issues mentioned. I recommend this read to those interested in improving the quality of their relationships and enjoying a more peaceful life. The information is relaxed and informative in its presentation; there are no to-do lists, but the reader may come away with actionable ideas.
******
Nice People Finish First
View: on Bookshelves |
Author Paul Wright is 77 years old and has been a mental health professional for 50 years. While studying to become a Methodist minister in college, Wright encountered some unattractive and unloving attitudes in the church he was serving. He found these attitudes so disdainful that he switched his major and became a psychotherapist. Over time, the author solidified his core belief in God and separated it from other religious practices that seemed contradictory.
As he helped his clients with their issues, he also searched for help when he faced losses and devastating circumstances in his own life. Wright noticed five principles, coined H.A.L.F.S., that help a person live a more peaceful life by improving their relationship with themself and others, and he shares them in Nice People Finish First.
This book reads as if you are having a series of conversations with Wright in his office—not as a patient, but as a valued friend with whom he wants to share his observations. The quality most apparent in the author, and one the writing focuses on, is humility: recognizing that we are valuable and everyone else is equally treasured. That healthy acknowledgment of the worth of all life establishes the foundation of his H.A.L.F.S. principles.
Two fundamental principles are forgiveness and the previously mentioned humility. The author stresses that by focusing on the first four attributes, spirituality is often a natural by-product. He skillfully negotiates this last component, recognizing the many ways to embrace spirituality. I will leave the reader to uncover the remaining two principles when they pick up their copy of this book.
The breadth of the examples referenced in this read reveals Wright’s varied interests and receptivity to the thoughts and actions of those around him. He includes revelations from his personal experiences and those of his friends and clients (names changed and with permission, of course). But he was inspired to write this book by watching the U.S. women’s artistic gymnastics team compete—and succeed—at the 2012 Summer Olympic Games in London. He noticed they were both competitive and supportive; they were nice, and they were successful. They combated the stress of this elite situation by having a healthy relationship with themselves (training to be in their top form) and with their teammates (respecting and honoring their achievements).
I appreciated the author’s intentional effort to include different religious views in the text. His worldview as a Christian formed the basis of his thinking; however, he cited examples from other religions, including atheism, which were informative and highlighted common themes across the spectrum. For instance, I reflected deeply on Buddhist scholar Sri Sri Ravi Shankar’s statement about forgiveness: “The person whom you are forgiving should not even be aware that you are forgiving them.” This view complements my Christian understanding of forgiveness.
I also respected Wright’s authenticity. (No, that is not the A in H.A.L.F.S.) He mentioned that in his earlier writing, he was hesitant to include references to his alcoholism, but his sobriety and insights gained from participating in Alcoholics Anonymous, particularly the spiritual component, were critical in honing the H.A.L.F.S. approach. I believe his honesty stems from humility.
The lack of professional editing was the only negative aspect of my reading experience. The author’s delivery was engaging, but when I approached the last 20 pages of this 168-page book, the writing lost focus and repeated some concepts. I flipped back to check the table of contents and found that one did not exist. The absence of the structural reminder of a table of contents explained the meandering flow, which had been noticeable but not distracting until that point. Professional editing would also have been helpful in correcting the missing words and changing sentence structure throughout the read.
I rate Nice People Finish First3 out of 4 stars, deducting a star for the editing issues mentioned. I recommend this read to those interested in improving the quality of their relationships and enjoying a more peaceful life. The information is relaxed and informative in its presentation; there are no to-do lists, but the reader may come away with actionable ideas.
******
Nice People Finish First
View: on Bookshelves |
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