4 out of 4 stars
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Divorce brings heartache to those involved from financial upheaval, uncertain living conditions, and child rearing. It is difficult to imagine what this is like unless you have gone through the experience. With marriages ending at a rate of 42-45 percent, it is prevalent and leaves many broken pieces in its wake. This author focuses her book, Divorced After 50: Your 8-Step Guide to Healing and Renewal, toward helping women reestablish themselves after fulfilling a role as a spouse.
Nancy Osier has firsthand knowledge of what it is like to have a long term relationship end after years of commitment. She has had two marriages terminate, with the second one happening while in her fifties. She understands the shattering of the spirit that occurs when two parties no longer remain together. Her purpose in putting together this guide is to give hope to those who are either contemplating leaving a spouse or are in the aftermath of a union that has ended. She details the pain she experienced, the joys of discovering herself again, and she desires to be a light at the end of a dark tunnel for those who are just beginning on this path. The case studies she includes add to the comfort that this book provides.
How does a person rebuild herself after saying 'I do' and has anticipated life as a couple? In step one of this book, the author has her readers engage in what she calls putting together a self-care toolbox. It is filled with items and ideas to choose from to let the body and mind participate in relaxing activity away from the emotional noise of loss and pain. By consistent adherence to taking care of oneself, the heart begins to mend and leads to moving on to revamping one's life. Each step after that is built on this first one including tapping into inner guidance for answers and finding a solid sense of security in oneself.
What I liked most was the section where she speaks about creating a sacred space. She suggests designing a dedicated spot that has special meaning. Whether this would include fragrant candles, antiques or drawings that have personal significance, this location's purpose is to allow for quiet and harmony. Also, I thought her exercise on reframing painful experiences was a great way to assist in overcoming the past. She has her audience visualize an old memory that had negative consequences, and instead of seeing it end the way it did, a new, uplifting conclusion is imagined which empowers the mind. I thought both of these techniques would be simple to try and bring positive results.
There wasn't anything about the book I didn't like. While I did not find any errors in punctuation, spelling or grammar, I did discover that she might have incorrectly listed the name of an author from a book that she references. Often, when I read a book about a subject, and if another one is mentioned, I search to see if I would be interested in reading about it further. When looking up the title Divine Intuition on Amazon, I typed in the name Lynn Anderson as the author suggested. The last name that kept coming up in association with the title was Lynn Robinson, not Anderson. I would recommend that the author checks into that to make sure it is accurate. Other than that, this book seems to have been professionally edited.
I am awarding this a 4 out of 4 stars because of its quality writing, applicable exercises, and I think it will help a significant number of women. Not only is the writing sharp, but there is also a link to a Facebook group where readers can connect with others who have read the material along with contact information to get in touch with the author. Like she emphasized throughout, it is essential to have a support group to help get through this tumultuous time. I would recommend this book to those who are going through a divorce, on the brink of one or who have finalized the papers. While the title sounds like it is geared for those over 50, I found myself thinking that this could easily apply to those who are somewhat younger. If self-help isn't your genre of choice, then you probably wouldn't appreciate this one.
Divorced After 50
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