Official Review: Dishonorable Justice

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ayoomisope
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Official Review: Dishonorable Justice

Post by ayoomisope »

[Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Dishonorable Justice" by Lance William Hansford.]
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1 out of 4 stars
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Dishonorable Justice: Tales of the Black Widows, by Lance William Hansford, is a fictional crime story of a band of bikers named the Black Widows. The group is an all-female motorcycle club formed by Virginia Mattson, with her closest friends, as a hobby. The book is written in a third-person narrative point of view.

The book opens by introducing a three-year-old Virginia and her family. Virginia’s stepfather, William Jones, constantly abuses her and his wife, Rebecca Jones. On one occasion, he beats Rebecca up so terribly that she winds up in a hospital. In the course of time, William neglects his family and starts a new life. Twenty years later, Virginia and the rest of the Black Widows embark on a journey to locate and exact revenge on William for all his former actions. They recruit new members along the way – LuAnn, Janice, Lorie, and Debbie. However, they encounter biker gangs, spousal abusers, crooked cops, and the mob en route.

Virginia Mattson’s character is properly developed and grounded. She has a brazen personality with violent tendencies, but she is emotional at her core. She seeks justice, albeit dishonorable and criminal, for the weak and physically abused. Her prior experiences with her stepfather motivate and direct her life’s choices. She forms the Black Widows with eight of her closest friends, and these ladies become her family. Her beliefs resonate deeply with all of them.

I appreciate the detailed character description section at the beginning of the book. This provides a little insight into the core members of the Black Widows. The portrayal of their biker gear is vivid and alluring. Furthermore, the gang is cautious, and they detail plans before execution. They are excellently methodical in prosecuting plans and adept at covering their tracks.

Notwithstanding, the book is replete with problems. To begin with, the book was not professionally edited. In fact, it seems it was unedited at all. There are many instances of shifts in verb tense even in the same sentence. Additionally, there are many run-on sentences, comma splices, punctuation errors, misspellings, sentence fragments, and dialogue issues (absence of quotation marks when describing dialogues in first-person). For instance, an excerpt from the book reads, “Virginia then decideddecides to travel cross country to capture her stepfather who had abused her as a child as well as her mother, he has been on the run…” Secondly, the narrative style is unprofessional, stiff, and sometimes lifeless. Many portions of the book contain irrelevant details, and this is more baffling when one considers the novel is only 124 pages long.

I rate this book 1 out of 4 stars. The multitudinous errors inevitably and thoroughly undermine all it has to offer and its ramifications. In addition, I would not recommend this to a younger audience due to the extensive use of adult language, provocative references, and violence.

******
Dishonorable Justice
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Post by Ginnamassa19 »

Oh dear. The first few chapters of your review had me intrigued--it's such a pity about the grammar/typo errors! I salute you for finishing the book despite the poor writing and editing, it must have been terrible to wade through no matter how interesting the premise is :P

Thank you for your review, it was really clear and i found it very helpful. :) I hope this book gets properly edited soon--it seems like it has such a promising plot!
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Post by Libs_Books »

Ginnamassa19 wrote: 18 May 2018, 04:01 Oh dear. The first few chapters of your review had me intrigued--it's such a pity about the grammar/typo errors! I salute you for finishing the book despite the poor writing and editing...Thank you for your review, it was really clear and i found it very helpful. :) I hope this book gets properly edited soon--it seems like it has such a promising plot!
Yes, I agree with all of that. From the example you give, ayoomisope, ("decideddecides") I suspect someone did go through it making suggested corrections and then they somehow got included, rather than accepted. What a pity.
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Post by isa3030 »

Dishonourable Justice by Lance William Hansford is a genre fiction,crime,violent abused,emotional story of a female motorcycle club formed as a hobby,a narrative story of a three Virginia Wiliam and her family.Virginia's stepfather,William Jones always abuse her and his wife Rebbacca,in one such assult Rebbacca was hospitalzed .In time William Jones neglected his family and relocate to find new life.Years later Virginia and other members of the Black Widows set out on journey to search for William Jone hoping to couse revenge on him for his past life,recruiting LuAnn,Janke,Lorie,and Debbie.On their way encountered bike gang and mob.An interesting review work,Virginia Mattson's character was emotionally developed,she look for justice against dishonourable and criminal for the weak and the physically challenged.Her former experience with her stepfather derected her couse .Rating it 1-2star noting irrelevent details,misspelling,unprofessional narrative style and poor editing if at all,recmmend to adult readers
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Post by Bianka Walter »

This is a really great premise for a book. What a pity about the editing. It does take away from the story when the book is virtually illegible.
Well done on persevering and for the great review!
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Post by ayoomisope »

Bianka Walter wrote: 18 May 2018, 05:24 This is a really great premise for a book. What a pity about the editing. It does take away from the story when the book is virtually illegible.
Well done on persevering and for the great review!
Thanks for the comment.
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Post by kandscreeley »

The errors would definitely take away from the book. In addition, I just don't think that this is a subject I would enjoy. It sounds too violent for me and not a genre I usually read much of. Still, I appreciate the information. Thanks.
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Post by Samantha Simoneau »

Another thorough and honest review helps me dodge a reading bullet. Thank you for the warnings about the lack of editing and adult language. This is a new addition to my "not interested" shelf.
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Post by Sanju Lali »

Thanks for the warning in the review about the errors and language suitability for all ages. May be author rewrite this book to make it more appealing
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Post by ayoomisope »

sanjus wrote: 18 May 2018, 10:28 Thanks for the warning in the review about the errors and language suitability for all ages. May be author rewrite this book to make it more appealing
Thanks for the review. I hope so too.
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Post by ayoomisope »

Ginnamassa19 wrote: 18 May 2018, 04:01 Oh dear. The first few chapters of your review had me intrigued--it's such a pity about the grammar/typo errors! I salute you for finishing the book despite the poor writing and editing, it must have been terrible to wade through no matter how interesting the premise is :P

Thank you for your review, it was really clear and i found it very helpful. :) I hope this book gets properly edited soon--it seems like it has such a promising plot!
Thanks for the comment. Although, the premise is promising, it was a chore to finish the book actually.
“Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counselors, and the most patient of teachers.”
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Post by ayoomisope »

Libs_Books wrote: 18 May 2018, 04:43
Ginnamassa19 wrote: 18 May 2018, 04:01 Oh dear. The first few chapters of your review had me intrigued--it's such a pity about the grammar/typo errors! I salute you for finishing the book despite the poor writing and editing...Thank you for your review, it was really clear and i found it very helpful. :) I hope this book gets properly edited soon--it seems like it has such a promising plot!
Yes, I agree with all of that. From the example you give, ayoomisope, ("decideddecides") I suspect someone did go through it making suggested corrections and then they somehow got included, rather than accepted. What a pity.
Maybe. That's a possibility. I just hope the book can still be salvaged somehow.
“Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counselors, and the most patient of teachers.”
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Post by gen_g »

This sounded really promising, but it is a massive pity that each element was not well executed. Thank you for your detailed review, but I would have to give this a pass.
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Post by Lolo Skyooz »

Seriously, that must have been a tough one to finish. Thank you for doing the review and being so honest. Writers need to know how their work affects people on a realistic level if they ever hope to improve, and as a reader, I sincerely want to see good quality writing dominate the market.
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Post by kdstrack »

Thanks for your review. The editing errors are especially frustrating. I think the adult scenes and violence only up the level of frustration for the readers. Nice job.
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