Official Review: The Daughter of Tommy the Killer

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Sen_Suzumiya
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Latest Review: The Daughter of Tommy the Killer by Larry Tinsley

Official Review: The Daughter of Tommy the Killer

Post by Sen_Suzumiya »

[Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "The Daughter of Tommy the Killer" by Larry Tinsley.]
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1 out of 4 stars
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The Daughter of Tommy the Killer is the second book of a book series written by Larry Tinsley. The story follows Natasha, the daughter of a serial killer named Tommy Bones. When her father is killed by the locals, one hundred years ago, he swears that he will come back to take revenge. Natasha, who has a special gift of growing old whenever she wishes, decides to wait until her father returns to put an end to him once and for all. The years go by, Tommy Bones rises from the dead to fulfill his promise, and Natasha is the only one who can stop him.

While the plot intrigued me to read this book, as I'm a lover of this genre, I was soon let down. In the next few paragraphs, I will try to explain thoroughly the reasons why I rated this book so low while trying to avoid spoilers, in case someone wants to read it.

First of all, this book hasn't been proofread at all. I highly doubt the writer read it twice before it was published. Sadly, I was able to find more than ten errors on the very first page. Having so many punctuation and grammatical errors made it extremely hard to read. There were no commas, the sentences were very long, sometimes repeating themselves, and overall there was no coherence. As for the grammatical mistakes, there are many misspelled words or even wrong words, and the author always used "was" when it should be "were".

In addition, even if we overlook the fact that the book was not proofread, it was very hard to follow the story and understand the timeline or the way the scenes were following one another. Since, as I previously mentioned, I don't want to give away spoilers, I'll give a vague example to explain what I mean. Someone in the book gets pregnant, and after approximately 3 weeks she is giving birth to a healthy baby. This example proves my point. I won't give you more details, but, since the book is small, it was easy for me to recheck the timeline of this incident, and I'm pretty sure I wasn't confused. Things like that kept happening in the book constantly. Thus, characters made no sense and had no development. I couldn't understand what was happening most of the time. I was feeling like I was reading a draft and not the original book.

Unfortunately, I have to give this book 1 out of 4 stars. I really want to support aspiring authors because I know how they feel, so I always try to find something positive to write, despite my negative review. The plot, as an idea, was really good and it could turn into a very interesting book. Thus, I believe that the writer should not give up and rewrite this book. When he does, he should send it for professional proofreading. If you like a quick adventure you can read it, but it's plain to see that I don't believe this book is ready to be read yet.

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The Daughter of Tommy the Killer
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Rachel Lea
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Post by Rachel Lea »

I agree with you that the initial premise for this story sounds intriguing. It's unfortunate that the idea could not be executed properly. Thank you for your honest review!
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Post by Michelle Fred »

I hope the author takes your review to heart, and does what needs to be done. I also think the premise is intriguing enough to make a good story if rewritten.
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Post by kandscreeley »

I'm sorry you had to suffer through this one. I've read books that jump forwards in time the way this one does. It's always jarring and confusing. I hope the author takes your criticism to heart. Thanks.
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Meg98
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Post by Meg98 »

This does sound like a unique and interesting story, but I understand why you gave it the rating you did. Thank you for your honest review! Great job
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Post by Dentarthurdent »

More than ten errors in just one page, yikes! Between this and the inconsistent timelines, I can see how the book failed.
Great review!
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Post by Stephanie Elizabeth »

It's too bad about all the errors; great review though!
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Post by Amenrodion »

So sad, the plot sounds really fascinating. I hope the author takes your advice and rewrites the book. It sounds like it would make for a great read
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Post by Laila_Hashem »

I agree completely. Although the plotline of a book may be interesting, spelling errors are something I could never tolerate when reading a novel. Thanks for the great review though!
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Post by Moray_001 »

Thanks for your review. The storyline seems quite intriguing but it’s obvious this book needs a lot of editing.
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