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Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

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Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#1 by kandscreeley
» 22 Oct 2017, 14:50

[Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Metzra" by M. U. Phoenix.]

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1 out of 4 stars
Review by kandscreeley
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Metzra is a short fiction book by M. U. Phoenix. It's about 80 pages and can be read in one day. It is listed as belonging to the science fiction genre.

Raivy’s mother has recently passed away. He is devastated, and he decides to take some time to himself in the forest. In the meantime, Hitara who is a friend of Raivy's mother is not the same after her death either. She was the only one ever able to keep Hitara sane.

While in the forest, Raivy comes across a blue mist and enters. There he finds a different world called Metzra. This was a world his mother told him about in fairy tales when he was young. He meets a horsesnake (exactly what it sounds like) who says that he will help Raivy figure out who killed his mother if Raivy will come back to help their world find peace.

Raivy takes him up on the offer. First, though, they must go to Hitara. Raivy thinks he might be able to help her, since he also used to visit with Hitara with his mother.

The author mentioned that this was a book that you would think about long after reading. That's probably true as you'll be trying to figure out what the point of the story was. Moreover, you'll probably spend time asking yourself why you bothered to read it.

First, there were many grammatical errors. Many times words in a sentence ran together. There were also missing words all over the place. Beyond that, there would be tense changes in the middle of a sentence. All this easily could have been corrected by a good editor.

As to the plot, it was not fully developed. There were so many holes in the plot, it felt like a submarine with a screen door. I didn't understand what the two worlds had to do with each other. Plus, there were characters that the author tried to relate to both worlds. Instead of coming out and saying it, the author used another character to imply it. Unfortunately, I was too dense to figure out the implications.

Furthermore, the writing felt elementary and stilted at times. For example let me show you the following passage. “That is why I told you to use a black or brown hair color,” said Raivy. “You could have blended with the villagers, unnoticed.” It just doesn't sound realistic to me.

As for the ending, it is to be continued. Some pieces of the plot were wrapped up, but there were still many questions. It seems as if the author was trying to create a prequel. However, for me, it was unsuccessful.

Since the only redeeming quality of this book was its length, I'm forced to rate Metzra 1 out of 4 stars. The author would need to fill in some of the many gaps as well as get a good editor before I could recommend this book to anyone.

******
Metzra
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#2 by MsTri
» 23 Oct 2017, 10:47

Maaaaaaaaaaaan, what a downer! It sounds like it could have been fascinating, what with the plot, but they just totally blew a great idea. I'm sorry you had to go through that.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#3 by kandscreeley
» 23 Oct 2017, 10:49

Thanks MsTri... I was looking forward to it, but it just didn't work out.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#4 by Kalin Adi
» 23 Oct 2017, 10:57

LOL! You really cracked me up! I couldn't post my message after reading your review because I was laughing. From one point of view, the author must be proud because he achieved his objective... to keep the reader thinking after he/she has read his book.

Anyways, I really appreciate your honest review, kandscreeley. Based on the cover, I wouldn't imagine the book has so many flaws.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#5 by kandscreeley
» 23 Oct 2017, 11:21

Thanks Kalin...I'm still trying to figure out what the author wanted you to think about after the story was over...
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#6 by Mercy Bolo
» 23 Oct 2017, 12:08

This must have been an annoying book to read. I'm clearly not looking forward to the sequel.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#7 by kandscreeley
» 23 Oct 2017, 12:13

Thanks Mercy. I think I'll be skipping the sequel as well. :)
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#8 by bookowlie
» 23 Oct 2017, 16:00

Very honest, insightful review. It's always difficult to write a negative review, even if the criticism is constructive. I had to laugh about the positive point being the book's length. I read and reviewed a book last year that I didn't care for. Thankfully, it was less than 100 pages. The details of the story were so convoluted that I wound up reading several parts multiple times to understand the meaning and then struggling to write the ending blurb. By the time I finished, I felt like I had read a book that was twice as long as the actual number of pages.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#9 by meteku4
» 23 Oct 2017, 16:28

This is disappointing. The author should have done a bit better. Thanks for your honest review.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#10 by ritah
» 23 Oct 2017, 16:53

The cover looks interesting, too bad the book wasn't interesting itself. I hope the author considers revising the book.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#11 by Kat Berg
» 23 Oct 2017, 21:28

Oh, I have read a few books that were as poorly edited as this ones sounds. It is soooooo rough! Good for you on sticking with it though! Even a short book like that can feel like a thousand page monster. Good Editors really are worth their weight in gold, as well as really good beta readers who are willing to tell you the truth and give constructive feedback.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#12 by kandscreeley
» 24 Oct 2017, 07:27

Thanks for the kind words everyone. I appreciate you taking the time to read my review.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#13 by Quinto
» 24 Oct 2017, 09:46

Too bad with this one. Seems the author needs to look for an editor. Thanks for the review.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#14 by kandscreeley
» 24 Oct 2017, 10:03

Thanks Quinto.
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Re: Official Review: Metzra by M. U. Phoenix

Post Number:#15 by Kelebogile Mbangi
» 24 Oct 2017, 11:54

Your rating is well substantiated. I enjoyed reading your critique of this book, especially the part where you said the author was right in saying it is a memorable book that will stick with you because you will wonder why you bothered to read it.
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