Who is qualified to give advice like this?

Use this forum to discuss the November Book of the month "If life stinks get your head outta your buts" by Mark L. Wdowiak
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Sarah G
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Re: Who is qualified to give advice like this?

Post by Sarah G » 26 Nov 2018, 10:44

Most are probably doing it to help others that may be going through something they have come through themselves. It can be quite cathartic writing your issues down in a methodical way that it can often help the writer as much as it helps the reader.
The purpose of a storyteller is not to tell you how to think, but to give you questions to think upon

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Post by VandaQ » 26 Nov 2018, 10:49

Sarah G wrote:
26 Nov 2018, 10:44
Most are probably doing it to help others that may be going through something they have come through themselves. It can be quite cathartic writing your issues down in a methodical way that it can often help the writer as much as it helps the reader.
That is a very good point. It is very therapeutic to put down your thoughts - it is actually used in therapy, sometimes. From personal experience, having a blog or diary really helps put your thoughts in order and writing helped me through some difficult situations.

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Post by desantismt_17 » 26 Nov 2018, 12:05

I think anyone is qualified to give the advice. No one's life is in absolutely perfect order. It's about the journey every day, and if you find something that helps you, why not share? It's up to the individual whether to listen or take the advice. But there's no harm in giving.
You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

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Post by Kibetious » 26 Nov 2018, 22:08

Caylie_Cat wrote:
03 Nov 2018, 21:29
I wonder what makes someone decide that their own life is in such good order that they need to dispense advice to others? I'm not saying this author should not have written this book, and nobody is being forced to read it, but I just wonder about the motivation behind it? What do you think?
:D :D :D :D :D this is a wonderful question. It is thought-provoking and I have never really thought of it this although it is always there in my mind. I guess sometimes those who give advice may not necessarily be the best in what they are advising people.
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Post by Kibetious » 26 Nov 2018, 22:10

desantismt_17 wrote:
26 Nov 2018, 12:05
I think anyone is qualified to give the advice. No one's life is in absolutely perfect order. It's about the journey every day, and if you find something that helps you, why not share? It's up to the individual whether to listen or take the advice. But there's no harm in giving.
This is adequately true. We never really become perfect in something but we might be having something even a little thing that will help someone. If so, we should not let someone suffer. It is right to offer the advice.
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Post by Kibetious » 26 Nov 2018, 22:11

In my opinion, the author may not have reached a perfect state. But the reality remains that he observed a gap that needed to be addressed and he took the opportunity to give an advice. Anyone who has something that will benefit someone else can always advise.
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Post by Lmahle » 26 Nov 2018, 22:59

Manali_DC wrote:
04 Nov 2018, 03:20
I really like the topic you have thrown up for discussion because this is exactly what I have wondered every time I see a book of this genre. What makes someone think that their life is so perfect that they can tell others how to live theirs. And how is it that they are so confident about what they need to do in a given situation when most of us are assailed by doubts and uncertainties.
To be fair I think that people who write these have had experiences which have made them wiser or maybe they have put in a great deal of study into human behavior and they think that their experiences can actually help guide a few people in similar dilemmas.
I can understand where you’re coming from, but (at least based strictly on the information available In the book) I didn’t feel like the author had really gone through anything all that difficult or outstanding.

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Post by Kibetious » 27 Nov 2018, 22:03

Caylie_Cat wrote:
04 Nov 2018, 22:05
Jsovermyer wrote:
04 Nov 2018, 21:50
Alicia09 wrote:
04 Nov 2018, 10:26
There's obviously a monetary factor that could go into writing a book like this, because many people who are looking for advice may want to buy a book that offers advice on how to improve their lives. Then again, the author did mention a lot of personal stories of times when he made mistakes. So it could be a book that was meant to warn younger or more inexperienced readers about problematic behaviors and thinking patterns to avoid.
This author may have good intentions for writing this self-help book, but some do not. This kind of book is fairly easy to write. A lot of the advice is just common sense. And there is a great market out there for books that claim to make you happy, more succesful, and more time efficient. Everyone wants an easy way to make their life better.
That is so true. Human nature always seems to go for the quick fix, have it now, and make it easy sort of mind-set. Unfortunately, changing thought patterns and habits take a lot more effort than just reading a book. Knowing something doesn't mean it will help you unless you are prepared to do the hard things involved.
This is so true. I had never thought of it this way but it is true that having knowledge of something cannot help if someone is not ready to do what is involved. At times, what is required seems hard hence a few will be willing to try.
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Post by Kibetious » 27 Nov 2018, 22:05

'The examples, concepts, and principles expressed in this book are what I’ve found to be “the basics” for improving one’s life experience.' (Kindle Locations 76-77)
This is a quote from the book. So in essence, there is nothing new in the book. The only different thing is the tone that was used. The words are the 'basics' of life. Which means the author just saw the need to write this.
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Post by T_stone » 28 Nov 2018, 07:15

A lot of authors have a desire to touch others through their writing. As a person, if something works for me through times of troubles, I'd like to share to others how I overcame. So, I don't feel authors think they live a perfect life; in fact no one does. But, the motive behind many self-help books is to help others go through what the author has probably been through.
Feeling upset sometimes may be unavoidable, but acting distressed is always optional.

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Post by Lmahle » 28 Nov 2018, 19:46

I think it's less of a question of who is qualified, and more of a question of who really needs to give advice.

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Post by Jacci » 28 Nov 2018, 20:06

All of us have different experiences and get many lessons in life. I'm not yet as old as the author, but what I understand is their advices are good. It's up to me to it or not. However, most people who give advices confidently are those who does not experience in a painful situation like others. They give it out of someone's experience and somewhat based on studies. I wonder if the one who give advices will do the same as what he advices if that person struggles with the same situation.
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Post by MalMartin » 29 Nov 2018, 05:26

I don't think anyone has to be qualified to give advice because of how relative advice can be. This is a lot like how the authors definition of success was relative. Advice and success are things that look different to everyone. One person may give up too much of themselves for others while another may be very cold. I would not look at both of them and say "you should open up more" or "you should focus on yourself more," because they have two completely different problems. Advice is what the reader/listener interprets and then compare to their own life to see if it is applicable or not. I think advice is like food, sometimes its good for you, but other times it only tastes good and in the long run it hurts you.

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Post by SABRADLEY » 30 Nov 2018, 12:23

I like your topic. It's the exact way I feel. I think it's nice to try to help others but I also think it should be remembered that the advice should be taken with a grain of salt. Some advice can steer people in the wrong direction or possibly even be harmful. I would only ever consider a self-help book written by a trained individual. Spiritual books are the exception to this, and memoirs in which the author describes their personal approach to success are obviously another matter altogether.

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Post by Ferdinand_otieno » 01 Dec 2018, 01:55

No one's life is perfect and we all learn by making mistakes so in my opinion, i think anyone who has gone through their mistakes can give advice like this. It can also be said that receiving this advice is not a must for every reader.
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