Was there any way Natalie could justify her feelings for a married man?

[uyky]

Every person is responsible for their own actions. And they can justify their feelings, but that doesn't make the actions that hurt others right.

[Freddavanzo]

Actions speak louder than words, there really is no justification for feelings if they feel right to the person having those feelings.

[Mr Benji]

We must realize that emotions can overwhelm the mind at times, therefore we can't just act on all our feelings. So is the case with Natalie. I guess her emotions clouded her sense of judgement.

[qsusan]

I don't think Natalie's feelings need any justification. What is difficult and almost impossible to justify are her actions as a result of those feelings.

[morenikeji100]

I understand that, at that adolescent stage, she couldn't help but fall in love with a married man. Obviously, she is young to be able to control the love, but she is a strong girl, who can control her actions, because her mind set is more mature than her age.

[Zain A Blade]

When you step out of your cultural conditioning, you will discover that in many cultures in the world polygamy is allowed and even encouraged. So, in my view, Natalie's falling in love with a married man is not different from falling in love with any man that appeals to her. And if her society did not forbid it, she would have probably ended up becoming a happy second wife.

[nancyab]

It could have been that she fell in love with Mr. Glover because her natural father had died and her stepfather was an abusive alcoholic. He represented a man who was kind and considerate and that cared for her. I do, however, feel that she should have outgrown this, met and fell in love with an appropriate male and had her own family, of which she was deprived.

[qsusan]

Although polygamy is a part of many cultures, adultery is not and is often a graver crime in committees where polygamy is the way of life. Which id why O say her feelings need no justification but her actions do.

[Nanig83006]

So Natalie (and her tough childhood) had a reason for getting entangled with a married man, and at such a tender age. But there are also people who have engaged in such affairs not necessarily because they were in similar situations to Natalie's. Conversely, there are those passing through the same kind of trauma who didn't resort to that route as the way out.Therefore, her actions can't easily be justified. Yet, I can't blame her for being in a vulnerable state, having no one to advice her properly on such matters. However, the other person involved should have known better, rather, he made his choice to do something he knew was wrong, instead of being a help to Natalie by steering her thoughts away from it.

I agree. Personally, I think Natalie was forced to mature and was looking for a responsible, reliable, and stable adult. It makes sense she would turn to a married man. As you said, there are others who go through the same thing and don't follow the same path. She also didn't have someone to protect her. Her teacher should have known better, but considering the times, it was probably common for a young girl to with a much older man.You're right. If there had been one person looking out for Natalie's well-being, she likely would have had more of a childhood than she did and found a more appropriate love as she got older. While her actions aren't easily justified, they're completely understandable.

[KLafser]

Natalie is 16-years-old in this book and it is easy to understand a girlhood crush on a successful, articulate, kind man. Completely common for a girl (or boy) this age to fantasize about her crush. It bears acknowledging that, while she didn't resist, he initiated contact. Her willingness could be attributed to inexperience or naivety. I do appreciate that Natalie was glad to hear him speak highly of his wife and that he loved them both, differently.

There are all kinds of relationships out there, while it isn't how I live my life, it doesn't mean an open relationship doesn't work for others. My issue is not with the situation but with the fact that it was hidden. I appreciated the epilogue describing the relationship as it evolved (don't want to spoil it if you're not there yet).

[P0tt3ry]

So Natalie (and her tough childhood) had a reason for getting entangled with a married man, and at such a tender age. But there are also people who have engaged in such affairs not necessarily because they were in similar situations to Natalie's. Conversely, there are those passing through the same kind of trauma who didn't resort to that route as the way out.Therefore, her actions can't easily be justified. Yet, I can't blame her for being in a vulnerable state, having no one to advice her properly on such matters. However, the other person involved should have known better, rather, he made his choice to do something he knew was wrong, instead of being a help to Natalie by steering her thoughts away from it.

I agree. Natalie was emotionally stunted and susceptible. That's not really an excuse but 16 is not the most responsible or rational age. The married man was an adult and should have discouraged her. He could have been supportive without getting involved in an affair with a child.

[azerikaj]

Maybe they are that rare couple that's Meant to Be and their timing was off.
Although, no, I wouldn't advise that any young girl starts banging her boss hoping for this result...
I could even buy that they ended up together, but not really that they could live in the same small town as a happily ever after couple.

[Aphroditelaughs]

Natalie had no positive role models to teach her what an appropriate relationship should be. She also has no knowledge of what real love should look like. In light of that, I don’t think we can blame her for her choices in this regard. In as much as her conscience tells her what she is doing may be wrong, she has been brought up in a dysfunctional home. We can hardly blame her for wanting what she sees as a loving relationship, no matter the cost.

Without models for appropriate behavior, how can one be expected to make proper choices? And at that age, she is still so young, even though her circumstances have required her to grow up faster in some areas. Our brains finish maturing much later than many people think, and I don't think she should be blamed for seeking the security that she lacked as a child.

Why should she be the only one to justify her feelings? Should he have to justify his as well?

[Dignabookread101]

Natalie is very young to handle these feelings for a married man at a young age she needs guidance and a role model to look up to. No justification what's wrong will always be wrong what you've done will be also done to you later on the power of Karma. She had a misconception of love she needs someone who can give unconditional and true love.

[JuliaKay]

I think that Natalie can justify her feelings for a married man; sometimes it cannot be helped. However, her morals and integrity are brought into question when she acts on her feelings for a married man; this is where she has a choice. It probably is best for a woman in this situation to stay away from the man.