what myth or myths tackled in this book have been limiting your progree and success at life?

Use this forum to discuss the January 2018 Book of the Month, "And Then I Met Margaret" by Rob White
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Eva Darrington
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Re: what myth or myths tackled in this book have been limiting your progree and success at life?

Post by Eva Darrington » 10 Jan 2018, 00:47

TrishKissane wrote:
08 Jan 2018, 06:40
The myth that you have to "follow in your Father's footsteps". I have recently started to realise that my upbringing and family traits/traditions will of course have impacted me but the art is to take what was positive to me and walk my own path.
That is so true. We all have our own unique core gifts, even though they are obscured at times. And, they are almost always different from our parents'. As you've said, the trick is to recognize those gifts and use them to contribute to the river of life.
Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep. -Scott Adams

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Post by NL Hartje » 10 Jan 2018, 00:53

Definitely:

"Learn to fit in; play it safe— it’s right and proper"

Truly, who wants to live by those standards? I'm not saying it isn't comforting to be a piece of the whole in many situations but doesn't each soul yearn to have some differentiation? I mean, I believe it is a universal truth that we all have a unique redeeming quality. Shouldn't we each try to bring that out in ourselves? Or foster it in others? Take the time to help a friend nourish their "it" quality if they don't have the courage to do it themselves.
“So the writer who breeds more words than he needs, is making a chore for the reader who reads.”
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Post by Katherine Smith » 11 Jan 2018, 15:35

Two myths have been limiting my life. The first is "walk in your father's footsteps" because I had a chaotic childhood and have been trying to run from my family. I now realize that your upbringing shapes who you are, but does not define who your are. The second myth is "setting limits and creating a glass ceiling" because I like many people on this forum lack confidence in my decision making abilities. I go through all of the possible negative outcomes of the situation even if everything turns out fine.

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Post by Scrawling Pen » 11 Jan 2018, 19:55

"I know my limits; that's just the way it is." This myth has had a lot of impact on my life because I was never one to step outside of my comfort zone or push my limits. I've realized that when I step past my so-thought limits I often have the best experiences in life.

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Post by Kathryn Price » 12 Jan 2018, 14:35

Eva Darrington wrote:
09 Jan 2018, 22:39
The myth that I tend to believe is this: If you must choose between indecision and perhaps making a wrong decision—it’s right to choose indecision. I struggle with decision-making. What I know but forget is that sometimes taking action is the only way to make progress and learn new things. Indecision is stagnant.
Absolutely! It's encouraging to find someone else who struggles with this - this myth has been extremely discouraging in my life - I keep struggling with indecision even though I know that it would be better to choose. I'm so afraid of being wrong that it creates an endless cycle. Hopefully some of the things I'm doing now are helping to break that cycle.
"If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world." - C.S. Lewis

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Post by Momiji1987 » 13 Jan 2018, 03:56

SPasciuti wrote:
09 Jan 2018, 03:29
N_R wrote:
06 Jan 2018, 18:02
I think that the myth that I had was about the personal limits and abilities. The idea that you set your own limits and that you create a glass ceiling effect for yourself.
This is the one that got me, too. No matter where I've been in life, I've always had problems with motivation unless it's something I love doing. And sometimes, even then. And I feel like I always have this roadblock where I'm terrified of things not working out or I just assume it's not something I can accomplish so I set those limitations long before I even consider jumping over them. Ironically, it can be pointed out a million times and I still haven't figured out how to put into practice something that changes this.
I have the same exact problem. Sometimes I'll break free of it and get some progress done on my project, then someone in my life will ask about a technicality I'm putting off thinking about. I know it will prevent me from continuing because they are aspects beyond my control, and I begin to doubt myself and wish I could run away and find something less stressful to occupy my time with.

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Post by Gikonyo Caroline » 14 Jan 2018, 12:17

TrishKissane wrote:
08 Jan 2018, 06:40
The myth that you have to "follow in your Father's footsteps". I have recently started to realise that my upbringing and family traits/traditions will of course have impacted me but the art is to take what was positive to me and walk my own path.

true TrishKissane we pick the good and unlearn the lessons from the negative socialisation

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Post by Gikonyo Caroline » 14 Jan 2018, 12:30

Yaone wrote:
08 Jan 2018, 05:11
For me, the myth "I get trapped into doing the things I don't want to do".
Now we know we get to decide what to do and things or people in our lives only have the power we grant them over our lives

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Post by Gikonyo Caroline » 14 Jan 2018, 12:35

:twisted2:
bbowser wrote:
11 Jan 2018, 19:55
"I know my limits; that's just the way it is." This myth has had a lot of impact on my life because I was never one to step outside of my comfort zone or push my limits. I've realized that when I step past my so-thought limits I often have the best experiences in life.
absolutely twisted2 , indeed the only limits to an individual are thosè the individual beliefs and accepts to limit the individual's potential

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Post by Gikonyo Caroline » 14 Jan 2018, 12:43

Eva Darrington wrote:
09 Jan 2018, 22:39
The myth that I tend to believe is this: If you must choose between indecision and perhaps making a wrong decision—it’s right to choose indecision. I struggle with decision-making. What I know but forget is that sometimes taking action is the only way to make progress and learn new things. Indecision is stagnant.
sure , Eva, as they say in the end we will regret the things that we didn't do than those we did and failed at

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Post by Gikonyo Caroline » 14 Jan 2018, 13:19

Katherine Smith wrote:
11 Jan 2018, 15:35
Two myths have been limiting my life. The first is "walk in your father's footsteps" because I had a chaotic childhood and have been trying to run from my family. I now realize that your upbringing shapes who you are, but does not define who your are. The second myth is "setting limits and creating a glass ceiling" because I like many people on this forum lack confidence in my decision making abilities. I go through all of the possible negative outcomes of the situation even if everything turns out fine.
Katherine, I agree that your upbringing doesn't define who you are
could your sevond myth be more about your personality? If you are a strong Melancholic ? Tend to be very critical and analytical which can be a good and a bad thing. I am a strong choleric so I struggle with myths that encourage me to stay in my comfort zone because I love to be in control

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Post by Written Legalist » 15 Jan 2018, 11:12

The myth of trying to succeed to make my family happy. I place far too great a burden upon myself to primarily make my parents happy, without taking the time to look within myself. Rob taught me this.

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Post by Gikonyo Caroline » 15 Jan 2018, 12:49

JadeK wrote:
09 Jan 2018, 14:38
For me, the myth about personal limits and personal abilities was one that really hit home. I have heard that saying that you are your hardest critic and while I know this I still can't seem to get over the mental tug of war that I can do something or that I have done something well. I can see how I set the glass ceiling for myself and that I am truly my own worst enemy. I don't know what I can personally do to get over this but it is a work in progress for sure!
JadeK , I can relate with this inner battle. Perhaps looking at and focusing on your strengths and what you do well can help. Then use this to challenge the self limiting myths. In the end we all are work-in-progress

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Post by Gikonyo Caroline » 15 Jan 2018, 12:56

Written Legalist wrote:
15 Jan 2018, 11:12
The myth of trying to succeed to make my family happy. I place far too great a burden upon myself to primarily make my parents happy, without taking the time to look within myself. Rob taught me this.
[/quote Written Legalist, I can relate, and am learning that sometimes I will never be good enough or do enough for my bloodline. It is sad but true. So making them happy often costs most of us our happiness especially in line with our careers

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Post by Joy2thenations » 16 Jan 2018, 01:10

Written Legalist wrote:
15 Jan 2018, 11:12
The myth of trying to succeed to make my family happy. I place far too great a burden upon myself to primarily make my parents happy, without taking the time to look within myself. Rob taught me this.
I struggled with this too as a young adult, but one day as my grandfather was telling me what I shouldn't be and why, I realized that his definition of success was different than mine and I needed to be true to myself! I now live the life I dreamed and I know he would be proud of the woman I've become!

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