Use this forum to discuss the January 2018 Book of the Month, "And Then I Met Margaret" by Rob White
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I grew up in a small, blue collar town where I judged success by a person's ability to leave and be more successful elsewhere. I went to college and graduate school and ended up back working in that town after the death of a parent. I felt like a failure for ending up back where I started. White really made me stop and reexamine that attitude.
Did any of his stories make you draw similarities to your own life and experiences? Did it make you think differently about your preconceived ideas or judgements?
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It actually depends on how you look at success. If you believe leaving a small town and been more what others can achieve then that's success according to you. Even the author saw like that, first to be like his father and walk in his steps and be successful in the factory. But things chanced when he aspired to be more. It does not matter where your success comes from it is how much you have achieved in your life. The achievements are your success!
For me it was chap 17 about the British lady and her lesson to the author. The way she expressed her self to the author is truly commendable this really made me note things and want to take in my life: "cheerfulness in the face of rudeness, tolerance in the face of discourtesy and forgiveness in the face of intrusiveness". This showed me how too handle a situation in a truly honourable manner rather than behaving like a typical human been influenced by emotions.
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I think it was a reminder to me to be more confident and positive. Stories like the one with the deer really resonated with me. Especially in the modern world, it’s inportant to do what you can to help other people and stand up for your beliefs even if you’re afraid.
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Many of the stories resonated with me, especially the one about not thinking about the black cat. I found that I need to work on not thinking about the "black cats" in my life and focus on the positive.
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It was a good time for me to read it, as I'm in the midst of a fair bit of change in my life right now, some of it a bit scary. I feel I'm taking risks that a few years ago I wouldn't have had the courage to take. So a lot of it did resonate with me. The idea you should be true to yourself and your own ideals, not follow the path that seems set out, or the easy path. Go with what you want, work at it, and if it doesn't work out as well as you hoped, look for the good in the situation, what you do have, and what you've achieved.
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I can identify personally with this story because I am a nurse/caregiver and have touched many peoples lives in various ways. I don't have to perform CPR on a person to save their life, but sometimes, a smile or a hug can have a profound impact on someone's life. Whatever it takes to give them hope and a reason to live another day, that is success in my eyes.
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Just like Rob am a former teacher turned motivational speaker. I relate with stories ,more so, stories on identity which is my core message. I have also had to confront many myths raised in the book and replace them with truth which I live by. I am a student of life always seeking to learn new ideas and unlearn habits or thoughts that no longer work. I believe in getting the right mentorship to take one to the next level. I wish like Rob to be not only a success on the outside but a significant and successful person on the inside. I hope to globe trott and meet share a one on one with some of the gurus Rob met who have also had a huge imoact on my life albeit from a distance through their books and trainings.
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Through the stories and experiences of the author, i learnt that some of the myths that i have been having and limits i have put on myself are just ways am of holding myself back from looking at life through the lens of transformation and opportunities.
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I don't know that I necessarily personally related to the stories per se. I did, however, relate to the lessons that the author learned.
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It was a good reminder that life is not linear. There are many starts, false starts, restarts and sometimes you feel like your'e going backwards. However, the author shows us that there is significance in each of these moments, even though you feel like a failure.
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I appreciate the significance of not being reactionary in one's dealings with others. Life is a winding journey that requires the tools of fairness, patience and kindness.
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In the life I've lived I've found myself in many false starts like the boy learning to surf. What I find difficult is figuring out what's for me and what's not for me. If you keep trying in something that doesn't fit you, it takes up the time you could be doing what suits you. It can be a huge opportunity cost. The story of the founder of Kentucky Fried Chicken is a good example of someone who found his niche late in life, after trying and failing many times.
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I know how is life going with a simple environment. We grew up with a Father who work in the Government. He is a "High School TEACHER." And my Mother is a Dress Maker. We are four children in the Family and all of us are attending school. My Father tried his best to give us a better life. While Teaching full time, he decided to take a Law. Doing both activities, Teaching and Studying Law is not easy. Aside from we are obliged to deal with tightening our belt just to survive our daily life. Rob White is a very ambitious person. Hope all of our 65 or 70 years old relative can imitate what Rob White did at 70.
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I could only relate to the old maid aunt, really.
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I can relate this story with myself how I've gone backwards at times and feeling like a failure but there are always important lessons to learn from such experience