Co-ed Reading Groups

[patrickt]

An acquaintance saw me reading Crossing to Safety by Wallace Stegner. We started chatting and he asked me why I was reading the book and I laughed. He finally told me he was in a reading group that had 12 liberals and one conservative. He said they needed to have one more conservative. I commented I thought two conservatives might be two many for a dozen liberals but I was curious about what a book group was.

He told me what book they were reading and told me the date and location of the next meeting. I read the book, attended the meeting, and thoroughly enjoyed it. The group was all men, most were connected to the university, and we had a lively discussion. One of the members gave me a list showing what books they were reading and where each monthly meeting would be held. I went to the next two meetings and they were great.

At the end of the third meeting I mentioned to the man who'd given me the list that it ended with that meeting and I didn't have a new list. He said that was because they hadn't voted on my membership. I nodded and went home.

I didn't hear from them and assumed they didn't want a second conservative in the group. I was browsing in our locally owned bookstore, where I was well known, and one of the employees saw me studying a notice on their bulletin board for members for a new reading group. I was interested and saw the clerk watching me. I asked him if he was familiar with groups and he said, "No, but it's a mixed group, men and women. I've never seen one work. Maybe they do but I don't see how."

I had enjoyed the group so I went to the first meeting of the new group. It was a disaster. We discussed how to pick books. I mentioned that in another group the books were picked by the year so we could order them all at once from the independent bookstore and get a discount. "That is too structured. It destroys spontaneity." A lot of heads nodded. So it was decided that each month a different member would pick a book. I pointed out that there might not be fifteen copies of the book available in town and ordering one cut down on the amount of time you had to read it. Nope. That was silly.

Our first book was Death Comes for the Archbishop by Willa Cather. I thought the book was fine. I went to the meeting and the women running the meeting asked if everyone had read the book. Less than half had read it. A couple couldn't find a copy and some were just too busy.

Then a woman read a short selection in which the archbishop and the protagonist finally see the Pueblo they're approaching. It's hard to see because the stones and mud of the buildings blend into the landscape.

"Oh, I admire how the Indians built with such care for the environment. They just blend in with the nature of the area."
I nodded and said, "Yes, indeed. Two Moons had a group who wanted to build with fiberglass and aluminum and Chief Old Guy said they would stick to stones and mud to be one with nature."

I decided it was time for me to leave. Two of the other three men stood up, too. We left and went to a coffee shop on the corner and talked about the book. Later, the fourth man at the meeting came in. He'd seen us through the window. He got coffee and said, "I'd have left two but my wife's in the group and she'd kill me."

A few weeks later I got a phone call from the man who invited me to join the first group. He asked if I was coming to the next meeting. I said, "I haven't been to the last three meetings because no one let me know if I'd been voted in or where the meetings were." A long paused was followed by laughter. "There are no meetings in the summer. Most of the guys are professors and take the summer off. Exhaustion, you know. We have no vote for membership." I started laughing, too.

My opinion is that men and women read different books, read them for different reasons, and their discussions are certainly different.

Now that I live in Mexico, all I really miss is the reading group.

I'm curious. What are your experiences with mixed reading groups or, if lacking experience, your thoughts.

[DATo]

Sorry for my late response. I enjoyed reading your post very much. It is on point in many respects and I found myself both laughing and nodding my head to many of the comments you made.

To answer your question: I usually avoid all "reading clubs" because one must read the club's selected book and it might be one in which I have no interest; also, many of the people who join such clubs are actually looking for a social club, such as the ones you mentioned who had not even read the book, and not looking for a club with which to join others to seriously critique books. As far as diversity within such a group: I feel if the object of the club is honest and objective the political views, gender of the member, or religious affiliations of the member should have no effect whatsoever upon that member's opinions regarding the work. I admit that it can be difficult to BE objective when the message of the book conflicts with one's own philosophies and world views, but the ability to remain objective and judge the book solely upon its literary merits is, in my opinion, the mark of a truly good critic.