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Official Review: The Princess and the Thug

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Official Review: The Princess and the Thug

Post Number:#1  Postby Ayla » 13 Sep 2012, 13:05

[Following is the official OnlineBookClub.org review of "The Princess and The Thug" by Alm Hlgh.]

Book Cover for 9781463738327
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This one hundred plus page book, has you caught from the very beginning. This is your basic Romeo and Juliet tale with a twist! I liked the eerie beginning, it take you a minute to really register what happened. Then as you read the book, it engrosses you in the story of the main characters, and then finally you reach the ending; and is it a complete and utter shock! And then you finally realize what the beginning was about. However, there are some issues that I have with it. And these are: Spelling, grammar, use of language, character development, and separation indicators.First off, the spelling and grammar need to be rechecked, I know life is hectic; but it seems like the author was in a rush to get this story written. The author seems to have gotten an idea (or was inspired) and had to quickly write it down before she/he forgot.

Secondly, the use of repeated saying and language, needs to be addressed. For some of us; we don’t live in the streets or certain words are perplexing without a definition. And, there are other words or statements that can be used to describe a movement, sound ect. Using the same words over and over is a bit vapid.

Thirdly, the character development and description (character or otherwise) could use improvement. Tell us more about the characters, delve deeper into their past, their likes, dislikes ect. Don’t just describe them, how they live (whether they are rich or not) and then move on with the story in a hurry. Take the time to develop relationships, and interactions more.

I want to be able to connect with the characters, feel their emotions, what they are going though, I want to feel and see their reaction! Describe the places, don’t just name and then describe them in a hurry, be more vivid! I want to see the places and smell the scents in my mind, I want to mentally be transported to this place, i want to see, hear, smell, and touch everything!

Finally, the separation indicators need to be there! And this is mandatory! It was very confusing to read about a section and then have it suddenly switch perspective without an indicator there. I had to step back several times and figure out what had happened. Only to come find, that the scene, event, point of view changed and I didn’t realize it. Despite these issues, I rather enjoyed the story. But I would have rather seen a different ending then the original one it had. I give this book a 2 out of 4, for it was fair but it needs improvement for me to consider it for a higher rating.

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Ayla
 
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