Could you date someone who doesn't read?

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tootus4226
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Post by tootus4226 »

i would obviously not date someone who has NEVER read a book but i understand that people are busy and sometimes have a hard time finding the time to sit down and read a book
callalilly
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Post by callalilly »

My husband doesn't read books much. He reads tons of newspapers and belongs to a lot of forums online though. He is still very articulate, speaks well and is always interested in knowledge. We have stuff to talk about. Sometimes I bore him with whatever I am reading and he talks to me about politics a lot. I think it can be healthy for two people to have different interests.


On the other hand, what if your significant other reads smutty harlequin novels and drives you nuts? Is reading just reading or does it have to be a specific genre? :)
jim
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Post by jim »

I'm sure I could, but it's just almost a telepathic understanding that basically everyone I know is a regular reader, conversant with popular culture and everything that represents--so my social contacts, friends, etc. all share certain knowledge (though each possesses uniquely personal points of view, of course). Shared likes and dislikes can be good social shorthand, but not necessary; I just tend to avoid those with an inability to accept the differences of others, including differences of opinion. I thrive upon diversity.
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gillianb
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Post by gillianb »

Well I am married to an Austrian man and although his spoken English is good, he cant read it very well. He is a very busy man and just doesnt have time for reading. I sometimes do wish I could discuss books with him as they are such a huge part of my life and I would like him to share in it but unfortunately he just isn't interested.
hopeforthebest
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Post by hopeforthebest »

I could date someone who doesn't read but I couldn't be with someone who has a problem with me reading.
lovesbooks06
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Post by lovesbooks06 »

hopeforthebest wrote:I could date someone who doesn't read but I couldn't be with someone who has a problem with me reading.
I have to agree with you on that one.
Samacnab
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Post by Samacnab »

To me reading is not just an act, it is a symbol, a sign that someone has a general thirst for knowledge and/or intellect. I feel that there are other signs of this too, for instance, a lot of people simply do not have the time to read because they have weighed themselves down with school. This to me is another sign of wanting to learn. This I could find acceptable. However, there are also peopel who simply refuse to learn, people who would much rather turn on the TV instead of picking up a book. There are people who feel that knowledge and learning are unimportant in life, this I would not be able to deal with. To me reading is a doorway to the room of knowledge, but it is a room with many other doors. As long as someone was at least on her way there, I think I could date them.
Samacnab
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Post by Samacnab »

Also, I forgot to mention, that simply because someone reads does not necessarily mean that they have a desire to learn or even broaden their horizons. I have met many people who though they read choose not to read worthwile content. I am sure we have all read our fair share of books that were just fun or interesting but brought no particular value to us, but to simply choose only to read such material does no better than not reading at all.
Hoops4me2
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Post by Hoops4me2 »

The real question you are asking is if the person you date need to be on the same intilectual level as yourself. I believe he/she does. I don't see a long term relationship otherwise.
callalilly
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Post by callalilly »

Hmm, well that would explain my last marriage! :) Haha!
d3vinebr0wn
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Post by d3vinebr0wn »

Hoops4me2 wrote:The real question you are asking is if the person you date need to be on the same intilectual level as yourself. I believe he/she does. I don't see a long term relationship otherwise.
Agreed with you on that one. I mean, personally for me if the person I dated was either really above or below my intellectual level it would make just everyday conversation so much more difficult - i spose it applies for all relationships though, don't people usually gravitate towards others who are on 'their level'?
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Frozeninside
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Post by Frozeninside »

I have, but I tried to get them into reading. I'm lucky that my fiance for four and half years is a reader, and now ever since we've been together he reads more and tbr pile is growing.
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sleepydumpling
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Post by sleepydumpling »

callalilly wrote:On the other hand, what if your significant other reads smutty harlequin novels and drives you nuts? Is reading just reading or does it have to be a specific genre? :)
Now I resent that remark! I read harlequin novels (and none of them are "smutty") as well as a gajillion other genres, and I resent being judged by WHAT I read.

Reading is good for you, no matter what it is.
Have a Hoot: Read a Book! http://www.haveahootreadabook.co.uk

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callalilly
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Post by callalilly »

haha, I read those too sometimes. I have a ton of books and sometimes I have those too. :) I hope you didn't take that personally! :)
twerp2289
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Post by twerp2289 »

I definitely could...because I am and have been for more than two years. My boyfriend doesn't like reading for entertainment at all. He only reads if there's a very good reason for reading something specific. I don't mind at all. Reading is something that I love...it's one of my major hobbies...but that doesn't mean that he has to like it, too. There are plenty of other things for us to talk about...if there weren't, we would have gotten bored with eachother a long time ago =P
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